This is the silliest one yet. I grew up on the same block that Pat Boone lives on. I was in my early teens when he moved in. I even helped him catch his poodle once when she was in heat. I won't give away his address of course, so let's just say his maid could hit the
hotel on the cover of "
Hotel California" with a Gucci tennis ball from there and not hurt her throwing arm.
Mr. Boone has always been conservative. He made his fortune as sort of a goody-twoshoes alternate-Elvis who didn't scare uptight white people. White bucks vs. Blue Suede Shoes, so to speak. He earned his money honestly and can do whatever damfool thing he wants to with it, up to and including making a fool of himself. Trust me, us old farts don't give a shit about
that!
I think what shoved his old white ass off the fringe right edge was the fact that Ozzy Osbourne lived next door to him before he moved to the house seen on
The Osbournes. Heh. I think that would have been fun! Our next door neighbor was a
Russian spy. His wife gave me cookies. I could go on and on about People You've Heard Of whose yards and garages I snuck into and played in when I was a kid. I useta swipe Eskimo Pies out of
Rory Calhoun's garage fridge, f'rinstance. But I digress...
Then again, maybe it's because Beverly Hills has a high proportion of Jews. And Arabs and 'Persians' that weren't there in the old days.
My folks moved there about the time
Will Rogers was the
Mayor of Beverly Hills. They were well-to-do, but not filthy rich like you have to be to live there now. Point is, this is one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in one of the wealthiest towns in the world. Rich conservatives are just as loony and deluded as less well off ones, and for even less reason.
It's nice to see that Victoria Jackson can still get work now that her looks and mind have gone. I'm very compassionate. Heh.
LATimesBoone looked young and fit at 76, with his perpetual tan and stay-press hairdo. As I approached the stage, he was singing the song he'd written for the occasion — the first-ever "Beverly Hills Tea Party" rally.
Most of the people in the crowd were middle-aged or older, white and very angry in a Libertarian way about taxes and government spending. Several speakers and attendees said the movement isn't a Republican or Democratic thing; it's about the fact that political leaders are out of touch elitists, and the political process is broken and bankrupt.
Horseshit.
Of course it's a Repug thing, but there are dumbass Democrats too, I guess.
Joe Clark complained about how the overtaxing, overreaching government is determined to decide what car we drive, what doctor we see and what foods we eat. He doesn't trust either party, he told me. But his sign left no doubts about his preference.
"Teach A Man to Fish, The Democrats Lose a Vote."
The level of discourse, in other words, was not always clever or scholarly. UCLA's Bruin Republicans had a refreshment stand with a life-size cutout of Ronald Reagan, a curious choice at a small-government shindig, given that spending grew astronomically under Reagan, and the deficit exploded.
"Because it's a piece of ..."
And she looked like such a nice church lady.
I asked, perhaps ill-advisedly, what drew her to the rally.
"I'm an American," she said, foaming. "I'm a patriot. I'm a constitutionalist. I believe in the Founding Fathers."
OK, I think I've got it. And dare I ask what went wrong in the country?
"The progressives," she said, claiming the country had been given over to socialists, communists and fascists.
Welllll, not really...
Another thing I don't understand is how, if our individual liberties have been stolen, it's possible to stand in a public park and in the name of God call the black president of the United States a liar, a racist and a communist.
"I'm a beginner political activist," said former "Saturday Night Live" star Victoria Jackson, who took to the stage with a ukulele and sang "There's a Communist Living in the White House."
I thought either Jackson was satirizing the movement or that she was doing a Porky Pig impression. [...]
Ooooh! Cold shot! Come ta think of it, she does have sort of a porcine look to her since she, er, filled out. Let's hope she can't fly! I get a visual of a portly cross-eyed middle-aged slightly demented and vaguely satanic
Sister Bertrille on a weaponized broomstick...
Silliest damn teabagger rally yet, but funnier'n shit to an old homeboy like me.
