Dick Cheney’s Steno Pool

Mad Kane

Somebody please explain why the garbage and lies spewed by Richard Cheney are routinely treated like they’re gospel. Dick makes George W. Bush look like a statesman, for heaven sakes. And yet media outlets (read this one! - G) love to present the former Veep’s vicious distortions and malicious rants virtually without challenge.

The latest example is Politico’s regurgitation of Cheney’s lengthy tirade against President Obama. A tirade, I might add, made on the eve of Obama’s Afghanistan troop buildup speech at West Point.

Politico deserves a double limerick, don’t you think?

Dick Cheney’s Steno Pool (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Politico, kindly explain
Why you act like Dick Cheney is sane.
You repeat all his lies
Like they’re truthful and wise.
Your stenography’s worse than inane.

Richard Cheney has harmed our great nation.
Yet you act like each Cheney quotation
Is golden and true,
Worth transcribing on cue.
You’re not journos — you just take dictation.

I think if I got the chance to interview Cheney, which is not really what I would like to do if I got within arm's reach of him, I would ask him this question:

"While you're in prison awaiting the gallows, are you likely to get into arts and crafts or would you rather work in the laundry?"

Quote of the Day

Dr. Myers:

A study that tried to analyze how pornography affected men's views ran into an unfortunate problem: no control group. It seems there does not exist a population of males that doesn't see some porn regularly ...

Heh ...

Sometimes, even a blind squirrel ...

Or two, finds a nut. Last night on Goofball, Chris Matthews asked Howard Fineman a question. That and the answer were quite telling. Paraphrasing:

Matthews: Would Obama have voted for this [the "surge" in Afghanistan] were he still a senator?

Fineman: No.

Amazing how things change with your perspective.

Thank fucking god it's Friday ...

Quote of the Day

Maru (again, I know, but she's the best):

...

Um, Huck, what part of “long and violent criminal history,” “repeated, in writing, that Clemmons should remain in prison” and “108-year prison sentence” didn’t you understand? You fucking imbecile? [!!!!!1!!]

Take 30,000 and call me in the morning ...

Jon Stewart:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
30,000
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Health Care Crisis

Vid stolen from Heather.

Light Blogging Today

Mrs. G has a rare local dentist appointment this A.M. and I'm going along to visit with the Doc and his lovely wife who is the brains who runs the joint. He is a Vietnam Vet Navy dentist who worked with Marines and later retired from the Air Guard as a General. Also to go to lunch after at this joint. Yum. Won't need any supper tonight, you betcha!

Thought I'd leave ya with a little light entertainment:

NEW YORK - A home movie showing a relaxed Marilyn Monroe apparently smoking marijuana has surfaced, retrieved from an attic some 50 years after it was filmed.

The reel-to-reel silent, color film taken at a private home in New Jersey was recently purchased by collector Keya Morgan for $275,000 from the person who took the film, who has asked to remain anonymous.

Thanks to EmAminee.

More contractors!

Our pal Montag points out that along with the "surge", we'll be getting more Blackwater (or a reasonable facsimile):

Along with the increase of 30,000 troops to the Kabul Quagmire, there will be an increase in the number of private contractors and mercenaries hired to support their effort. As the Army Times reports, we would be much better off without some of that "support".

...

How we'll win ...

We won't. If you read anything today, read D-cap:

...

Defeating Al Qaeda does not equate to rooting out terrorism - but 8 years since 9/11 and many in this country actually believe that if we capture (and execute) Osama bin Laden or any of his thirty-four #2 lieutenants, terrorism will stop. This is true 1984 - endless war. Fighting will not kill the ideals behind the terrorists. But it will keep the bottom lines of many companies very happy.

...

More "light distraction" ...

I could watch this all day. Heh ...

Hey Santa ...

Take yer kettle and bell and shove it up yer ass. Ain't getting shit from me except for maybe a loogie.

The most useless ...

Governing body ever devised by humankind. That would be the New York State Legislature:

ALBANY — The State Senate defeated a bill on Wednesday that would legalize same-sex marriage, after an emotional debate that touched on civil rights, family and history. The vote means that the bill, pushed by Gov. David A. Paterson, is effectively dead for the year and dashes the optimism of gay rights advocates, who have had setbacks recently in several key states.

...

They've been useless since this nation was founded and seem to have no qualms about continuing the tradition.

A little light distraction

Barf bag alert! This is the scariest cruise ship video I've seen. Apparently she lost her engines in a big storm in the western Med.

If ya look close, you can see the always unflappable Fixer with his toes curled under the bar rail, holding a quintuple Jack Rocks with a perfectly gimballed wrist lest he spill any. Nothing messes with his enjoyment of a cruise!

Looks to me like anyone barfing over the lee rail (as they should) got their face wet.

Cruise ship Voyager makes way through Rough seas.

Beeb article here.

Thanks to mytube308, Oz.

Effedupistan Speech Analysis

For a more thorough and knowledgeable same-day analysis of Obama's Afghanistan speech than you will get from the soundbite gasbags and bumpersticker pols, please go see last night's 55-minute Charlie Rose. The link might be a little iffy as the vid is on the home page now and that might change. Let me know if you have any problems with it.

Of particular interest to me are the opinions of Martha Raddatz and Dexter Filkins, who between them have more war zone cred than the gasbags and pols due to the fact that they've been shot at in Iraq and Afghanistan more than all the rest of them put together and are real journalists.

Obama, the great disappointment?

Here's a column by Mark Morford that I needed to read and its timing in the wake of last night's speech is uncanny:

But not so fast. Back here in the dwindling twilight of the '00s, there is much puling from the liberal left that Obama has not done nearly enough, quickly enough, that his list of accomplishments is no list at all and is more of a giant, infuriating shrug. Many are saying he's not all he's cracked up to be because he has yet to completely revolutionize every aspect of human life as we know it by instantly turning everything organic, curing all diseases and setting all gay military personnel free to romp in the fields of boot camp.

Where is the complete ideological overhaul of the entire federal government? Where is the Gandhi-like pacifism? Why are we sending 30K more troops to Afghanistan? What about my new job, my single-payer health care and my tiny car that runs on sunflowers and hemp popsicles? Indeed, rabid impatience has combined with impossible expectation to give many liberals a free ticket to the land of nonstop bitching. Alas.

Conversely, there is all manner of incoherent noise spewing like radioactive urine from the far right, a nonstop wail of childlike panic claiming that, because Obama behaves with unnerving calm, shakes hands with foreign dignitaries and doesn't seem interested in bombing everyone in a turban, he must be a socialist Muslim Nazi hell-bent on banning machine guns and killing all old Republicans in their sleep and replacing them with French-speaking hip-hop jazz musicians.

The good news is, both sides are wildly, fantastically, delightfully wrong. [...]

But somehow, as I delved in a bit more deeply, as I scanned those lists and noted all the changes in a single year, I found myself reenergized, invigorated, slapped awake at the new tone and direction, the sheer scale of all the changes, and how we are no longer the rogue macho cowboy laughingstock jackass of the world.

Sure, there's still a long way to go. Yes, we're still invading Afghanistan. Wall Street is still packed with jackals and demons. DOMA still exists. All is far from perfect. But times have changed indeed. Things are most definitely not what they once were. I can think of no better news to report.

Thanks, Mark. I needed that. I can wait for the world of rainbows and unicorns and piles of puppies for a while longer now.

You owe it to yourself to go read the rest.

Oil of L.A.

Go see this interesting video of oil rigs in odd places in Los Angeles and a short history of the 'awl bidness' in the city of my birth. I've known about this since I was a kid and it's amusing to me that it keeps getting re-discovered like it's something new.

The crux ...

Of the biscuit from Comrade Misfit:

...

Too much hinges on Pakistan. If the Pakistani government keeps on covertly supporting the Taliban, which they have done all along, I don't see how this can end well.

We can't run a supply line through there because security is so dismal. Every branch of their armed forces and intelligence machine have been infiltrated by Taliban sympathizers. All of our stuff has to come into Afghanistan by air for fear of it being destroyed while sitting on the ground in Pakistan.

How in Hell are we supposed to support 30,000 more troops?

Obama is also relying on an increased NATO commitment. From where? The British people have had it. The Germans (after the number of innocents killed in the fuel truck incident) want their people out. And Europe in general is war-weary. The NATO commitment will be slow, if it ever happens, in coming.

Gordon said in his post last night this morning:

...

Obama talked me into giving him a shot. 18 months. I don't like it but I can live with it. He's not Bush.

And that's the only thing giving me comfort. He is not Bush. I'm praying the man has a conscience and truly believes he will not be squandering U.S. lives in a futile effort. I'm hopeful he will give the operation more commitment than the previous administration.

What bothers me is Bush's generals are still in charge of the warfighting apparatus. I still don't see how we're supposed to "train" the Afghans up into a cohesive national army and police force when their first loyalties are to their families, their tribe, and money, not necessarily in that order. How do we get a race of people who feel happier in the 10th Century to accept the role we've ordained for them in the 21st? In only 18 months? I can't see it but if it happens, I'll be cheering the loudest.

I just hope, after this is all said and done, our government will give the same commitment to the troops coming home (our record so far has been dismal). You know, those who've left parts of their bodies and minds behind on the battlefield. I hope they planned for that as they talked strategy for "winning" this misguided war.

Rude Pundit's Live Whiskey-Blogging

The Rude One watches Obama's Afghanistan speech.

If it's time for another special primetime appearance by a Commander-in-Chief, it's time to break out the sippin' whiskey (the shots are for press conferences). The Rude Pundit was given a bottle of Tom Handy rye, and, sweet belchin' Jesus, he can tell already that this is gonna kick his ass like a 'roid-rager at the gym arguing over who's next on the lat machine.

8:05: Will he actually say that Bush and Cheney fucked it up?

8:06: Nope. "Decisions were made" that led to war in Iraq. He shall still not be named. But, apparently, in 2011, there better be a few hundred thousand more jobs available in the United States for the returning troops and laid-off Blackwater employees.

8:08: So, yeah, he increased troops, just like he fucking said he would.

8:09: "Disrupting, dismantling, and defeating" al-Qaeda and Taliban are the goals. How soon before right-wingers note that Obama pronounces "Taliban" like he's Harry Belafonte?

8:16: Fuck him for making this sound reasonable. Fuck him for making it seem like it'll work. Fuck him for making this whiskey be sucked down faster than it ought to be.

8:19: Speaks to Afghan people. Pashtun goat herders in their thatch lean-to's feel their ears burning.

8:34: Oh, shit, he's actually talking about how we were allegedly so unified just post-9/11. Look for Glenn Beck to sue right after eating his own face on the air.

Shit, I'd watch him if he'd do that!

8:35: That's good: "Right makes might."

And we're done.

Bottom line: he wants one last shot to make right what Bush fucked up. But that doesn't take into account that maybe it was never possible in the first place to get it right.

Much more.

Obama talked me into giving him a shot. 18 months. I don't like it but I can live with it. He's not Bush.

Quote of the Day

Maru:

To the knowing glances of legions of young Dominican boys, repulsive misogynist Rush Limpbag announced he will marry an actual human female on July 4th. Unless the presumably non-feminazi regains her eyesight and/or gets off the crackpipe.

...

We Need to Stop Pretending That Obama Hasn't Been Consistent on Afghanistan

[A big welcome to our pal Badtux' readers - F.]

The Rude Pundit

Let's not kid ourselves here:

"This is a war that we have to win. I will send at least two additional combat brigades to Afghanistan...We need more troops, more helicopters, more satellites, more Predator drones in the Afghan border region." - Then-candidate Barack Obama in his last big speech about Afghanistan, July 15, 2008.

Several more quotes like that.

How many more quotes do you need on this? 'Cause there's probably a couple of hundred or so more, every single one of them with Barack Obama calling for an escalation in the number of troops in Afghanistan. Hell, it was an easy applause line.

His acceptance speech for the Democratic nomination? "When John McCain said we could just 'muddle through' in Afghanistan, I argued for more resources and more troops to finish the fight against the terrorists who actually attacked us on 9/11."

Then he'd better invade fucking North Africa 'cuz that's where al Qaeda is these days. What the fuck is there for us in Afghanistan except goats and the men who love them?

So let's be grown-ups here as we get ready for President Obama to make his new, big Afghanistan speech and say that the man didn't lie to us. He told us for the last two years that he was gonna send more troops. In fact, about the only thing he's guilty for during this long period of contemplation and meetings is getting our hopes up that he might be changing his mind. Out here in Left Blogsylvania, we desperately read things like his delay in announcing a strategy and his trip to Dover Air Base as the signs of transformation. Nope. Turns out that he was just figuring out how much to up the number from two brigades.

Americans are also finally getting to the point of accepting that Afghanistan is not the "good war" we had hoped it was. It's just, now that there's at least some movement on Iraq withdrawal, we're paying attention, and, oh, wow, hell, there's actually people dying and we're not really sure why. For so very long, many on the left were willing to use Afghanistan as a way of demonstrating how tough they could be while condemning Iraq.

Guilty, I guess. I supported the war in Afghanistan. Times change.

But this isn't about Obama or even the Afghanistan war. It's about us. As we see Obama capitulate, hedge, or hesitate on all the liberal things he promised, it's just goddamned depressing to see him so readily follow through on the hawkish promises. And it also forces us to realize that all that protesting of the Iraq war was far, far too narrow in scope.

That's what we get for letting profit-driven warmongers hijack our country and now we have to live with it.

Tonight: Live whiskey-blogging the speech.

For some reason, Rude-o's 'live whiskey-bloggings' get a little looser as they go on...

"You gonna say anything bad about boardercross, eh?"

Amy Goodman ran afoul of a batcrap crazy Canadian border guard. Go here and scroll down and watch the video.