Monday, February 17, 2020
Report: Bloomberg Campaign Awash in Cash
Could have enough left over to buy presidency of two more countries.
Justice Dept. Reverses Course, Recommends Shorter Sentence for Roger Stone
Also suggests he be given Presidential Medal of Freedom.
Astronomers Intrigued by Regularly Repeated Signal From 500 Million Light Years Away
Many say it sounds “just like an old-fashioned busy signal.”
Survey: Many Parents Give Their Babies Outlandish Names to Stand Out on Social Media
Like Hashtag Rabinowitz.
Posted by Gordon at 02:22
Saturday, February 15, 2020
Monday, February 10, 2020
PELOSI RIPS UP TRUMP'S STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS
She explains later: a flamethrower wasn't available.
Harper's Index: 40% of American Schools Have Police Officers Stationed Inside Them
The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is an out-of-work ex-cop with a checkered past and a drinking problem with a gun.
Study: Babies Don't Hesitate To Share Food, Help Others
It's only later they become Republicans.
Los Angeles House Put on Market for Record $500 Million
Being pitched as “perfect starter house” for young Saudi family.
Posted by Gordon at 12:02
Saturday, February 8, 2020
Monday, February 3, 2020
PUNXSUTAWNEY PHIL PREDICTS AN EARLY SPRING
Followed by melting of the polar ice cap.
UK: Brexit Begins
Drawbridge raised, moat filled.
GMC Unveils Electric Hummer Pick-Up With 1,000 Horsepower
Rev the engine and all across America lights dim.
Alan Dershowitz: If President Believes His Reelection in the Public Interest He Can Do Anything He Wants to Get Reelected
For instance, he could poison his wife, or knife her to death, or even enslave underage girls for his personal sexual pleasure if it helps his chances.
Posted by Gordon at 16:49
Saturday, February 1, 2020
Monday, January 27, 2020
“Star Trek” Fans Outraged Over Trump's Very Similar Space Force Logo
Trump responds, threatens to sue “Star Trek” for trademark infringement.
Republicans Hold Firm Against Conviction
Warn it would be like throwing the big baby out with the bathwater.
Mr. Peanut Killed in Mountain Climbing Accident in New Super Bowl Ad
In another Super Bowl ad, Tony the Tiger is shot and stuffed by Donald Trump, Jr.
Revealed: Hacking Device Used by Saudis to Hack Jeff Bezos's Phone
And they bought it on Amazon.
Posted by Gordon at 02:30
Saturday, January 25, 2020
Monday, January 20, 2020
HOUSE DELIVERS ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT TO SENATE
After which McConnell hands Nadler a five dollar tip.
Russia: Entire Government Resigns so Putin Can Extend His Rule Beyond 2024
Fortunately, that can't happen here until next January.
Gwyneth Paltrow's Candle Called “This Smells Like My Vagina” Sells Out
It's the most popular of her products that smell like her vagina.
Kansas: Nuclear Missile Silo Converted Into Underground Castle Selling for $3.2 Million
Would list for twice as much were it not still targeted by Russian ICBMs.
Posted by Gordon at 02:24
Tuesday, January 14, 2020
Yikes: Only 28% of Registered Voters Could Point Out Iran on Map of Region
Even a map with place names.
Prince Harry, Meghan Markle Announce Plan to “Step Back” From Royal Family, Live Abroad, Make Own Living
Their dream: run a B&B in the Poconos.
Facebook Will Continue to Allow Lies in Political Ads
After impassioned lobbying by both parties.
Drunk Shopping Accounts For $39.4 Billion Each Year
Not including the booze.
Posted by Gordon at 12:04
Saturday, January 11, 2020
Monday, January 6, 2020
Federal Reserve Report: Trump's Tariffs Raised Prices, Cut Employment, Hurt Manufacturers
President derides report, calls Fed “left-wing outfit made up of never-Trumpers!”
Study: Regularly Eating Chili Peppers May Extend Your Lifespan
But for some people an extra ten years might not be worth it.
Report: Robot Priests in Our Future
And they really are celibate.
New Study Reveals Serious Safety Vulnerabilities Among Self-Driving “Smart” Cars
They can be remotely commandeered by anyone with a PlayStation Model 3 or later.
Posted by Gordon at 02:33