Friday, February 10, 2006

Let's send old people off to war

After reading this article in the EssEffChron, I'm calling the recruiter - as soon as I remember where I put the phone...

Many Americans are becoming impatient with this sacrifice of the young people who comprise our combat forces, soldiers with their whole lives ahead of them. I think the public attitude toward casualties could be changed by the simple expedient of extending the age of eligibility for military service to, say, 85. Think about it. How much strength or physical fitness is required to drive a vehicle down the road?

What if, rather than pester high school students (and their parents) about enlisting, military recruiters focused their efforts on nursing home residents? Sure, many with advanced Alzheimer's or hooked up to Foley catheters might be unenthusiastic about military service, but I guarantee you that some World War II vets who haven't really felt significant since 1945 would be happy to make use of their still-valid driver's licenses in the service of their country.

Imagine these guys -- or women -- at the wheel of a humvee in Fallujah or Kirkuk. The insurgents would have no idea what to make of it. ("Hang on Achmed, I think he's turning left. No, wait, he just put on his right directional.") You don't have to throw their timing off by much to make them miss.

In our daily lives we're accustomed to seeing people die full of years, having finished most of life's assigned tasks. We couldn't possibly feel the same sense of loss as we do when a young person is taken in the flower of life. This would achieve an important Bush administration objective and result in increased public tolerance for casualties.

It also might serve as an opportunity for some elderly members of the current national leadership to shed their "chicken hawk" label. People like Dick Cheney or Dennis Hastert could at last have a crack at the combat that eluded them during the 1960s. Since there is no apparent end in sight to the war on terror, President Bush himself might eventually "age in" to the geezer brigade. With his driving record, he might even be eligible for a waiver to join immediately on leaving office.

The only drawback I can see is that I hear GI-issue 'Depends' are scratchy.

No comments: