Top 25 Dick Cheney Facts

Give Us This Day Our Daily Dread

• Dick Cheney does not sign contracts with the Devil- He makes the Devil offers he can’t refuse.

• Dick Cheney’s burps smell like Iraqi infants.

• Dick Cheney doesn’t have a defibrillator but a Halliburton pump station.

• People actually go fuck themselves if Dick Cheney tells them to.

• Dick Cheney’s new house is in the center of Mordor.

• Eve sprang from Adam’s rib but Liz Cheney had sprung from Dick Cheney’s bile duct.

• Dick Cheney once made General Pinochet stand in a corner for an hour for not killing enough liberals in Chile.