From the "Latest Headlines" crawl:
Study: New York safer without cops
Jobs Rise, Wages Fall in December
Translation: more people have lousy jobs.
Magic Mushrooms Found in Queen Elizabeth's Garden
“I don't know nothin',” says the Queen.
NCAA to Assist Players' Families With Travel Expenses to Championship Game
And hope families keep mouths shut regarding billions players bring in while getting paid nothing.
You're just one embarrassing blunder away from being an Internet sensation.