Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Huckabee Goes Off On Coulter. Heh.
Raw Story
Go read the rest. Unfortunately, the phrase 'lying, delusional, AFAB* wingnut slut' did not appear.
A Democrat could never have gotten away with calling out the darling little bitch of the far right. I'm glad the Huckster did.
Now that he's not in danger of being President, if he ever was, I'll admit to kinda liking him, especially after this.
*AFAB - Anything For A Buck
Former Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee gave conservative pundit Ann Coulter a warm welcome when she appeared on his Fox News show on Saturday, but it didn't take long for the knives to come out.
After confronting Coulter with a series of her insults and lies about him during last winter's primaries, Huckabee proclaimed, "This is my 'get even' moment with you, Ann. I've been waiting for this for a long, stinking time."
Go read the rest. Unfortunately, the phrase 'lying, delusional, AFAB* wingnut slut' did not appear.
A Democrat could never have gotten away with calling out the darling little bitch of the far right. I'm glad the Huckster did.
Now that he's not in danger of being President, if he ever was, I'll admit to kinda liking him, especially after this.
*AFAB - Anything For A Buck
Quote of the Day Zwei
A comment from Fixer's post below:
Jim's been a friend of ours for years and we watched him burn out. It wasn't pretty. As much as you'd like to throw your arm around his shoulder and soothe him, the blogosphere doesn't really allow for that. Everybody's on their own, and do what they have to do as is their sacred right. We're damn glad he still comes to visit.
A casualty of the various wars being waged against this nation by the right wing, and not the only one by a long shot.
I must admit to no small amount of satisfaction that the gasbags of print and the small screen (larger than the one I'm looking at and much more widely viewed) are starting to grow some little ones and are catching up to us, 'us' being Left Blogtopia (y!sctp) in general. They're not calling for his head yet as they should, so they still have a ways to go.
Note to the Press Corpse: you were Bush's Monica, and now you're crawling out from under his desk is about what it amounts to. You swallowed everything that came out of him, balls and all, so just wipe yer chin. And don't get all uppity and righteous just because you're not smokin' his pole any more. The truth was out there the whole time for all to see and you bungled it, pretty much on purpose. Shit, he had you thinkin' that little cocktail weenie of his was a summer sausage and you made a meal out of it and asked for more, please sir. We'll remember.
I have a little badge I wear on my hat sometimes that has the following phrase on it that I think exemplifies the majority of the media:
"I must hurry and catch up with the others, for I am their leader!"
Money shot: WE HAVE BEEN RIGHT ALL ALONG AND KNOW IT. And now, like a vacation spot known only to a few that suddenly gets discovered by the masses, Bush-bashing is indeed all the rage.
Looking at it a different way, we have been holding the fort praying reinforcements would come, and now that it's safe, they have. They will of course take all the credit for their foresight and bravery about Bush. It's all bullshit, but at least they're here, puny as they are.
Damn.
Well, ain't this a bitch? I burn myself out from Bush-bashing, and now it's all the rage.
Damn.
Jim Yeager
Jim's been a friend of ours for years and we watched him burn out. It wasn't pretty. As much as you'd like to throw your arm around his shoulder and soothe him, the blogosphere doesn't really allow for that. Everybody's on their own, and do what they have to do as is their sacred right. We're damn glad he still comes to visit.
A casualty of the various wars being waged against this nation by the right wing, and not the only one by a long shot.
I must admit to no small amount of satisfaction that the gasbags of print and the small screen (larger than the one I'm looking at and much more widely viewed) are starting to grow some little ones and are catching up to us, 'us' being Left Blogtopia (y!sctp) in general. They're not calling for his head yet as they should, so they still have a ways to go.
Note to the Press Corpse: you were Bush's Monica, and now you're crawling out from under his desk is about what it amounts to. You swallowed everything that came out of him, balls and all, so just wipe yer chin. And don't get all uppity and righteous just because you're not smokin' his pole any more. The truth was out there the whole time for all to see and you bungled it, pretty much on purpose. Shit, he had you thinkin' that little cocktail weenie of his was a summer sausage and you made a meal out of it and asked for more, please sir. We'll remember.
I have a little badge I wear on my hat sometimes that has the following phrase on it that I think exemplifies the majority of the media:
"I must hurry and catch up with the others, for I am their leader!"
Money shot: WE HAVE BEEN RIGHT ALL ALONG AND KNOW IT. And now, like a vacation spot known only to a few that suddenly gets discovered by the masses, Bush-bashing is indeed all the rage.
Looking at it a different way, we have been holding the fort praying reinforcements would come, and now that it's safe, they have. They will of course take all the credit for their foresight and bravery about Bush. It's all bullshit, but at least they're here, puny as they are.
Damn.
Question of the Day
Asked by BuzzFlash:
To which I replied:
Proudly lowering the tone of political discourse on a large news link! And they let me! It doesn't get any better than this!
Do you believe that Barack Obama's efforts to play nice and 'bipartisan' with the Republicans will yield any positive results?
To which I replied:
Submitted by Gordon on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 1:06pm.
It's laudable for Obama to want to play nice with the Republicans, but I think he's going to learn that it's like playing nice with a schoolyard bully. You have to kick his ass first. Besides, kumbaya-singin' liberal attitude aside, I think we deserve some payback on those sonsabitches. Stomp 'em flat for all the harm they've done. Then we'll talk.
Proudly lowering the tone of political discourse on a large news link! And they let me! It doesn't get any better than this!
Quote of the Day
Maru on the idea of Bush writing (heh ... Bush writing) a memoir:
Woke up way late. See yas later ...
Shit. Maybe he should have Barney write the damn thing. It would have more truth in it.
Woke up way late. See yas later ...
Monday, January 12, 2009
You know ...
Every fucking cable and broadcast channel is gonna have "a look into the Bush Presidency" special program over the next 8 days. I just got one question.
Where the fuck were all you people while this guy was fucking up?
Seems like the only people yelling about all Bush has fucked up over his term were me, Gord, and the couple thousand other bloggers who've been at this every day for years. Now there's a cottage industry for slamming Bush? Aside from Olbermann, Air America, and us, who in Hell had the balls to ask the questions that needed to be asked?
Not Tweety. Not Dead Ass Timmeh. Not Little George's Hair. Not Uncle Charlie. Not Tom, The Greatest Generation. Fuck all these spineless bastids who lined up, on their knees, with their mouths open, every time the White House issued a set of talking points. I don't want to hear it. On Thursday, the Chimp is gonna say goodbye and that'll be the end of it. Trust me, you ain't 'cutting edge' beating on Bush now. You ain't even 'fashionably late'.
Where the fuck were all you people while this guy was fucking up?
Seems like the only people yelling about all Bush has fucked up over his term were me, Gord, and the couple thousand other bloggers who've been at this every day for years. Now there's a cottage industry for slamming Bush? Aside from Olbermann, Air America, and us, who in Hell had the balls to ask the questions that needed to be asked?
Not Tweety. Not Dead Ass Timmeh. Not Little George's Hair. Not Uncle Charlie. Not Tom, The Greatest Generation. Fuck all these spineless bastids who lined up, on their knees, with their mouths open, every time the White House issued a set of talking points. I don't want to hear it. On Thursday, the Chimp is gonna say goodbye and that'll be the end of it. Trust me, you ain't 'cutting edge' beating on Bush now. You ain't even 'fashionably late'.
Here’s One Way for Obama to ‘Move On’ From Bush’s Illegal Policies
SPR
Don's being satirical because that's what he does, but it's a damn fine idea.
I wouldn't use the fictional Bauer though. He's gotten this country in enough trouble already, since that show is where Bush and Cheney got a lot of their ideas on torture in the first place. Life imitating bad pop art.
I would use really large nasty-ass combat Vet Marine Gunnery Sergeants. Give 'em armbands and sidearms and arrest warrants and carte blanche to use whatever tactics they choose and tell them to treat B & C like they were the guys who had sent so many of their comrades to unnecessary deaths in Iraq. A thorough background in how White House politics caused there to have to be two battles in Fallujah when the Marines were mere yards from winning the first one oughta do for motivation.
Another phalanx of MPs would bring in a whole lot of neocons in their usual gentle, caring, sensitive manner.
Then I'd have 'em all 'renditioned' to Base Building 3 at Camp Lejeune. The brig. Put 'em in with a buncha Iraq Marines whose conduct upon return due to PTSD or TBI put 'em there. I think it'd be really fun to see what Yoo and Addington think of torture after a coupla weeks of that! Probably not too much since they'd likely be dead. Why waste money on lengthy, costly trials for war criminals?
At some point, I'd offer the Decider and Bush their choice of ways of doing the right thing and see if they have balls to do it. Pill or Pistol. See if they're the men Hitler was. My bet is they aren't.
Be glad I'm not in charge of this country. There'd be some Change all right.
"Exactly 24 minutes after I'm sworn in, I'm gonna have Jack Bauer swoop in, arrest Bush and Cheney right on the podium, and have them renditioned for some enhanced interrogation techniques. Now, unnerstan', I normally don't believe in shipping jobs overseas, but we simply have to put some things behind us and move on."
Don's being satirical because that's what he does, but it's a damn fine idea.
I wouldn't use the fictional Bauer though. He's gotten this country in enough trouble already, since that show is where Bush and Cheney got a lot of their ideas on torture in the first place. Life imitating bad pop art.
I would use really large nasty-ass combat Vet Marine Gunnery Sergeants. Give 'em armbands and sidearms and arrest warrants and carte blanche to use whatever tactics they choose and tell them to treat B & C like they were the guys who had sent so many of their comrades to unnecessary deaths in Iraq. A thorough background in how White House politics caused there to have to be two battles in Fallujah when the Marines were mere yards from winning the first one oughta do for motivation.
Another phalanx of MPs would bring in a whole lot of neocons in their usual gentle, caring, sensitive manner.
Then I'd have 'em all 'renditioned' to Base Building 3 at Camp Lejeune. The brig. Put 'em in with a buncha Iraq Marines whose conduct upon return due to PTSD or TBI put 'em there. I think it'd be really fun to see what Yoo and Addington think of torture after a coupla weeks of that! Probably not too much since they'd likely be dead. Why waste money on lengthy, costly trials for war criminals?
At some point, I'd offer the Decider and Bush their choice of ways of doing the right thing and see if they have balls to do it. Pill or Pistol. See if they're the men Hitler was. My bet is they aren't.
Be glad I'm not in charge of this country. There'd be some Change all right.
Speculation In The Pursuit Of Profit Screwed Us All. So What's New?
Excellent bit on 60 Minutes last night. Worth a look if you missed it.
Q: Which is the largest oil company in America?
A: Morgan Stanley.
Q: Which is the largest oil company in America?
A: Morgan Stanley.
Awwwwww...
I stole this charming picture from TBogg because I'm a coward. Go read the short post that goes with it. I think I like those folks.
I have many photos of Mrs, G in similar circumstances with our pups, Princess Perfectpants and The Goofiest Springer On The Planet, but she has told me that I will only post them on my last day on the right side of the dirt, for indeed the day that I post them will be my last.
I have many photos of Mrs, G in similar circumstances with our pups, Princess Perfectpants and The Goofiest Springer On The Planet, but she has told me that I will only post them on my last day on the right side of the dirt, for indeed the day that I post them will be my last.
I shudder to think of what would have happened if I had chosen 'large' instead of 'small' for the picture size! It would have spilled over onto people's sets down at Starbucks!
Why Bush Loves Violence
The News Shrink
Eight years of him pulling the wings off the biggest fly he could have ever imagined - the world and all the people in it. His mother and father must be very proud.
George Bush’s presidency is the culmination of a lifelong history of sadistic practices that he must deny in order to maintain his fragile psychological equilibrium. Since childhood, Bush was labeled a bad child, a troublemaker, and a delinquent. He stuck firecrackers into frogs and exploded them; he shot and wounded his little brothers with a b-b gun; he branded fraternity pledges at Yale with red-hot coat hangers; he mocked others and was a verbal bully, irreverent about anything serious.
Now, as this bad-boy president prepares to leave office, many of his critics are pinning his failures on bumbling incompetence. The conventional wisdom holds that Bush is either a good hearted guy who got in way over his head—or the puppet of Dick Cheney. But if he were simply good-hearted he wouldn’t have mocked his own reasons for committing our young men and women to war; if he were a puppet, he was a puppet who chose his puppeteers. In my psychoanalytic exploration, the trail of destruction wrought by Bush over the last eight years is the direct consequence of handing a man with a destructive personality profile tremendous power.
By January 20, George W. Bush will have inflicted enough damage worldwide so he can retire to a quiet life of watching others scramble to clean up his mess. The missions he accomplished as president all bear the personal brand of his destructive streak: astronomic debt to China, horribly wounded veterans, a crippled health care system, and America’s damaged international reputation. And they will continue to be felt for years to come. What once started as cruelty to animals, siblings, and fraternity brothers has blossomed exponentially.
Eight years of him pulling the wings off the biggest fly he could have ever imagined - the world and all the people in it. His mother and father must be very proud.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Fan mail ...
As an author, I love getting feedback on my books, especially good feedback. Heh ... I got an email this morning about my novel Special Operations (you'll have to buy it, sorry) from a fellow Air Force vet and aside from the kind words, he has a problem that maybe one (or more) of our readers might be able to help him with:
Now, I know certain shit doesn't make it into personnel records (like our time operating around the 'Iron Curtain') due to the sensitivity of the times (the height of the Cold War). The time frame this gentleman is interested in happened before I went in and I hope one of our readers can help him. Email me if you have any info and I'll pass it on. Thanks for your help.
Mr. [Fixer],
I do hope this actually reaches you. It was the only address I could find. I just finished reading your novel "Special Operations". It was recommended by an old active duty officer friend, who knows of an interest and background of mine. I must say I not only enjoyed it, but have to ask if you perhaps received any "ideas" when on active duty.
My name is all over the Net trying to find data on and offering rewards for information about the 601st DASS (Direct Air Support Squadron), the guys who "First" wore the Black Berets, and "other" events and places. Yes, we wore them even before even CCT did, though theirs was also Black, and in I wore that one too. You see, the Air Force claims that several units I served in as a ROMAD, especially the 601st (for 4 years) never existed, and as a CCT member too! (1268th Aerial Port Sq, another non existent unit that died about the time you were in middle school) Nor, did we do the types of things you described. I doubt anyone did just as you described, but the 602nd DASS, which WAS stationed in Korea, had several very highly classified missions that could have been altered very little, and fit right into the first few chapters of your book. By the time I was on the tenth page or so, my mouth was hanging open. I helped plan many of them for the entire ROMAD field, worldwide. You were jsut [sic] a decade or so off!
You see, the AF, and the US Military in general will never admit that AF units, especially, ever did such things. Well, guess what? They lie a lot!
I started as a Ground Radio Technician, which is the career field that all ROMADs came from, mostly non voluntary. I was one of the wierd ones who loved it. I would be packed in ten minutes if they called me, and 8 of that would be to pack my pain meds and braces. I first served as a ROMAD in 1967, starting in Peshewar Pakistan, at the base Gary Powers took off from. According to the AF, we were never there. Makes you wonder how he got that plane off all by himself!
I served up until 1974, when we were told that ROMADs would be "phased out", and joined CCT (my flash says "Combat Control Team", not AF Combat Control like the nice shiny target ones do) as a Ground Radio technician member also (there were 2 to a team then, the rest being Air Controllers). I was medicaled out of the field due to injuries before the ROMAD career field (then 275X0, now 1C4X0) was created. Sometime in the mid to late 70's all of those units "disappeared". FOIA requests get you the answer they never existed. In fact, if you ask for MY records you will find the National Archives say I went to Peshewar on a TS assignment in 1967, and evidently never made it back, because that is the last entry in my entire personnel record. My reenlistment DD214s all show overseas duty, (2 reenlistment's were AT those non existent units!) but my discharge DD214 at retirement, with 20 years, 21 days (medically ordered, not allowed to re-up because of medical disabilities (probably received carrying radios) shows I ONLY server 2 years and 4 months at Vandenberg AFB, CA, where I retired. NO other entries at all, and strangely enough, showing NO overseas duty at all. I have never been able to get that corrected as if I was overseas, where was I? No place I list existed. I must have been in limbo.
Not getting into it too far, but your book was NOT as totally "fictional" as stated. I wonder what your career field and rank were? I could find little on the Net, and have no time to "poke" too far. But, could have some of those story lines come from experience, rather than imagination? Regardless, a very good read. I am glad it was recommended to me, and now see why. Thanks for a little "go back memory", even if it didn't really exist.
[Name and personal information withheld]
Now, I know certain shit doesn't make it into personnel records (like our time operating around the 'Iron Curtain') due to the sensitivity of the times (the height of the Cold War). The time frame this gentleman is interested in happened before I went in and I hope one of our readers can help him. Email me if you have any info and I'll pass it on. Thanks for your help.
Weekend whorage
Oy, I've barely had time to post here, let alone anywhere else. Dad-in-law Fixer has been in the hospital since New Year's Eve and that's been taking up most of our time.
New chapters of Birthright will be up in the coming week. Sorry about the delay. If you like sci-fi and haven't started it, now's a good time to catch up.
I've also been crazy in the house, trying to get a lot done before we leave for the Caribbean in a few weeks.
And to top it off, I had a job in the shop that broke my balls. Gimmie a Jaguar any day.
And on that note, a little theme music:
New chapters of Birthright will be up in the coming week. Sorry about the delay. If you like sci-fi and haven't started it, now's a good time to catch up.
I've also been crazy in the house, trying to get a lot done before we leave for the Caribbean in a few weeks.
And to top it off, I had a job in the shop that broke my balls. Gimmie a Jaguar any day.
And on that note, a little theme music:
Rod Stewart - Gasoline Alley
Sunday Crazy Northern Arizona Martian Hillbilly Music Blogging
Got this from FullMoonGrassGurl. I put it up for ya for a coupla reasons:
Northern Arizona, i.e. north of the Maricopa County line, i.e. a long way from Phoenix, is one of my favorite places in the world. One of the few places I could live other than here in the Sierra Nevada.
We all like Townes Van Zandt songs.
These guys are good.
This gal obviously likes Bluegrass, and one of the things she likes to do is videotape drives and set them to music. She's got some good ones. Check 'em out.
Note to FullMoonGrassGurl: I don't care what color Grass yer smokin' under that FullMoon, Gurl. Good job. Keep on truckin'.
Northern Arizona, i.e. north of the Maricopa County line, i.e. a long way from Phoenix, is one of my favorite places in the world. One of the few places I could live other than here in the Sierra Nevada.
We all like Townes Van Zandt songs.
These guys are good.
The Mars Hillbillies at the Wine Loft in Flagstaff, AZ, May 2008. This fine band performs the 2nd and 4th Wednesdays of every month. Snowin' on Raton is a Townes Van Zandt song and one of my all time favorites :-) Great job fellers!!
This gal obviously likes Bluegrass, and one of the things she likes to do is videotape drives and set them to music. She's got some good ones. Check 'em out.
Note to FullMoonGrassGurl: I don't care what color Grass yer smokin' under that FullMoon, Gurl. Good job. Keep on truckin'.
"Cars" Our Town
Silly sentimental me. Here's a scene from one of my favorite movies. Grazie to treunonove.
If ya look close, you can see Fixer and the joint where he works. Heh. I'll probly catch it for that one...
Bellissima scena del film col sottofondo cantato dal grande James Taylor.
© Pixar
If ya look close, you can see Fixer and the joint where he works. Heh. I'll probly catch it for that one...
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Saturday Git'cher Toes ATappin' Blogging
Alert: If you have your keyboard on one'a them slide-out trays, like I do, shove it back under the desk lest you knock it to Kingdom Come with yer knees when ya get ta dancin'. Don't ask me how I know this...
Check out the two backup gui-tar pickers. I think one of 'em is Keith Richards.
Check out the two backup gui-tar pickers. I think one of 'em is Keith Richards.
Chuck Berry & Linda Ronstadt ~ Back In The U.S.A.
Michael Moore Lays Out His ‘Conditions’ for Sanjay as Surgeon General
SPR
Ouch.
Note to Sanjay: first you'll go to jail for illegal handgun possession, discharging a firearm within the city limits, and maybe attempted murder. Your AMA affiliation may make it gang-related, which enhances the sentence. Then your leg will turn green and fall off. Best of luck.
"Larry, I'll withraw my objections if Sanjay is prepared to film a segment where he shoots himself in the leg with an unregistered gun, and then seeks treatment under the 'health care plan' of an unemployed auto worker whose job has been shipped overseas."
Ouch.
Note to Sanjay: first you'll go to jail for illegal handgun possession, discharging a firearm within the city limits, and maybe attempted murder. Your AMA affiliation may make it gang-related, which enhances the sentence. Then your leg will turn green and fall off. Best of luck.
Goodbye to Bush in Three Minutes
David Swanson at AfterDowningStreet:
No, we won't.
Cindy Sheehan asked if I could record a 3-minute goodbye message to Bush and Cheney for her radio show, so I wrote down and read the following:
Never more than in this moment, George, have you been a uniter, not a divider. The joy at your departure is world-wide and wonderful. But I don't want to fully embrace it because I don't want this to be the last we see of you. When I was four years old I watched Richard Nixon leave, and that was just about the last we saw of him, and that is what brought us you. Instead, we should have had monthly reports of regret and repentance from Nixon's prison cell for 20 years. You yourself may have longer than 20 years to live, although with your boss we may have to hurry or invest in a heart transplant. My strongest wish, George, is to give you and Dick and Rummy and Condi and Yoo and Bybee and all the gang what you have denied to so many others: a fair trial.
Your stupid smirk and Cheney's nasty grimace will thankfully no longer be omnipresent, but the damage you have done will be much harder to remove, and if we do not punish you for it, it may be repeated and never undone. I wish you no ill. If letting you go drink and golf would impose a democratic rule of law on future officials, then that's what I would favor. As it happens, of course, that would only encourage people as mean and destructive as your brother Jeb, although not specifically Jeb, of course, since nobody with your last name will be able to win an election in this country for 50 years.
If you pretend to pardon the people who committed your crimes for you, we will challenge that absurdity in court, and we will pursue state, local, civil, foreign, and international prosecutions until you are behind bars.
Washington D.C. is going to look something like a colder version of New Orleans before you drowned it this month as millions of people get drunk on the delirium of seeing you drag your contemptible carcass out of town. Two events I plan to take part in illustrate the mood.
On January 19th, we're going to gather in DuPont Circle, march to the White House, and throw shoes and boots at you. Check out http://shoebush.org to see what we have planned.
On January 20th, we have a permit for an Arrest Bush demonstration on the sidewalk in front of the FBI building along Obama's inauguration parade route. We're going to be sending a clear message to your successor. Take a look at http://www.arrestbush2009.com
We've created nice warm sweatshirts that say Arrest Bush and Cheney, and people can go to http://afterdowningstreet.org to buy them. We'll be dressing for success, George, but without the flight suit, the aircraft carrier, or the bullshit.
You've lied to us for eight years, so the truth may not catch your attention, but this is the truth: we will not rest until you are convicted and incarcerated. (my em)
No, we won't.
Friday, January 9, 2009
2009: All panic, all the time?
Mark Morford on 2009 and some New Year's Resolutions.
Resolutions:
Well, looks like he's keepin' one of 'em anyway. Heh. Enjoy.
Is this the year? Is this the one where it all comes together and it all begins to make some sort of strangely cohesive sense, where you really begin to sink into warm pools of calm awareness laced with laughter and love and really healthy teeth, where you finally accomplish or at least begin all those lingering and latent projects you've been craving for so long, like learning to bake orgasmic homemade bread or creating that hyperliterate travel/sex blog or meditating at dawn, all while reminding yourself every single day to tell everyone around you how beautiful and important and luminous they are, and how grateful you are every moment just to be here, sharing space with them, touching the planet, feeling it all, entirely clothing optional?
Or was that last year? And this one can be summed up in two little words: "More Ambien"?
Resolutions:
8. Organize sock drawer in armoire of fears
9. Stop and smell the roses
l0. Stop and smell the roses, and then lean in a little closer and actually lick one to see if it tastes like God or sex or marshmallow or merely pesticide and dirt
11. Realize I do not have to stop and smell the roses all the time because goddammit I have a metaphorical rose right there under my karmic nose at all times, and I merely need to acknowledge it and appreciate it now and then and maybe get a nice little bud vase to put it in. And hell, maybe I don't even like roses, and that's perfectly OK, roses are totally overrated and overexposed anyway, right? Like vitamin water? Like Scarlett Johannsen? Like that guy from Maroon 5? Now orchids. There's a flower for you. I mean, a good orchid makes your average rose look like a toothless hag at the prom, you know? Basically like comparing fine rum to a bottle of Two-Buck Chuck, am I right? No contest, really. Yes, gimme a suggestive, dangerous orchid any day over a pitiable, lumpy rose. But hang on -- can you really stop and smell the orchids? Do they even have much of a scent? Besides, orchids are pretty sexual, yonic, pornographic, even. Sort've makes you want to do more to them than merely smell them, you know what I mean? Wait, would they arrest you for that sort of thing? I bet they would. Bastards. Then again, as catchphrases go, I suppose "stop and hump the orchids" has a pretty lousy ring to it. Hideous bumper sticker, too. OK, so roses it is. They are sort've nice, to be honest. Beautiful, even. Sorry about what I said before. I was just being a shmuck. Hell, who doesn't love a nice bouquet of roses? No one, that's who.
24. Write more while slightly drunk (see previous)
Well, looks like he's keepin' one of 'em anyway. Heh. Enjoy.
Idiot Stick
So I was reading an article about a resurgence of folks growing their own food, with this photo posed to resemble Grant Wood's American Gothic.
Jesus Christ, buddy, take a grinder to that fuckin' shovel! And get a spade for digging and use that thing for flingin' the dirt. It would embarrass me all to shit to get caught in a newspaper photo with my shovel in that condition! City folks, bah!
I use a shovel virtually every day, during the winter anyway, and have an extensive collection of them. The right tool for the job, and keep 'em in good shape.
The folks in the photo are in Topanga Canyon, I think. I know what they grow up there, and have for fifty years and more. Be sure to smoke at least three helpings a day. Heh.
Jesus Christ, buddy, take a grinder to that fuckin' shovel! And get a spade for digging and use that thing for flingin' the dirt. It would embarrass me all to shit to get caught in a newspaper photo with my shovel in that condition! City folks, bah!
I use a shovel virtually every day, during the winter anyway, and have an extensive collection of them. The right tool for the job, and keep 'em in good shape.
The folks in the photo are in Topanga Canyon, I think. I know what they grow up there, and have for fifty years and more. Be sure to smoke at least three helpings a day. Heh.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)