Sunday, December 7, 2008

Run, Tweety, Run!

P.M.Carpenter

Nothing has created so much breathless Internet stir since W. choked on a pretzel.

You recognized instantly, of course, that the "nothing" of which I just wrote is the nothing of Chris Matthews' possible -- probable -- run for the U.S. Senate, circa if not precisely 2010.

Plus, Arlen Specter isn't exactly the Huey Long of the Republican Party. He's about as boringly moderate as boring moderate can get, which is the only reason his extended tenure is endangered to begin with. Only the consecrated Whackos from the reddest hues of Whackoism are ever truly safe.

Eliminating Arlen only means eliminating the lingering vestiges of sanity in the GOP.

On the other hand, a Matthews run would irritate the bejesus out of the PUMA people -- and who can honestly say that that wouldn't be one helluva lot of splendid fun? I miss them, I miss them already, and I miss them deeply. They never write me anymore and I fear they're depressed. Matthews would give them something to live for, something to hang their hat-full of organized but homeless psychosis on.

So sure, that right there is reason enough, I suppose, for me to proudly don a "Matthews for Senate" button and then, maybe, when I'm feeling bulletproof, breeze by a few Women's Studies departments just to draw some amusing fire. It would seem like old times.

Please go read the rest.

Personally, I think Matthews has better sense than to run for the Senate. First, his entire body of work is on tape, some of which is the stupidest shit ever recorded, and a clever editor could cut inumerable 30-second ads that would tear him a new one and have us all either rolling on the floor laughing or throwing things at our TV sets. Second, he may not want to take the cut in pay.

We will see.

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