Quote of the Day

Fez:

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Which one of The Four Horseman* of the Asspocalypse are going walk in the limo tracks of Ronald Reagan and be driven to Philadelphia, Mississippi so as to metaphorically if not literally piss on the graves of Goodman, Chaney, and Schwerner by praising state's rights ("stahts rats") while decrying affirmative action, or possibly even race mixing?

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Shopping Day

Big day! Spa Day for the pups and breakfast at Q's! I'll leave yas with Morford since it's Wednesday.

How about issues and ideas, politics and public debate? Is it your most favorite thing ever to take the most combustible, extremist stance imaginable on nearly every topic, no matter how grotesque or absurd, and then slam your way through the nuances and counterarguments with a sledgehammer made of phlegm and odium just to get attention, gathering enemies and antagonism like a spent nuclear rod gathers imminent doom and wrapping the whole thing in a glorious sheen of brazen douchebaggery?

Is this you? Very good. Let us call you Option One.

Enjoy! See yas later.

Hardons and Jerkoffs ...

Jill looks at the reasons behind the Republicans' limpness and the kind of porn they need to get it up again:

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The national security and economic agendas we've seen from Republicans during this election season are nothing new. But it does clarify just why the low-information voter -- you know, the kind who would applaud a candidate who thinks that a President who wants everyone to have access to education and job training is a "snob" -- responds to Republicans. Because there's something reassuring about seeing, year after year, election after election, a bunch of white guys out there talking about the same things over and over again: The answer to all our economic problems is to give more money to the rich, and the answer to our fading American empire is to find someone to bomb. Republicans may have felt emasculated when a black man defeated Sen. Bomb-Bomb-Iran in 2008. They may be feeling emasculated when the economy starts to show signs of life for someone other than those in Mitt Romney's income level. I KNOW they're feeling emasculated when women rise up in the face of blatant misogyny and say "Enough!" But creating a nice big conflagration in the Middle East? THAT gets the blood flowing to the Republican member again.

Shhh ...

Sandra Fluke is a secret agent lady ... or something. Thankfully, Thers spent more time on it than I did:

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Wow, that is some devestating evidence that Sandra Fluke is "being sold by the left as something she’s not." She was Cunningly Disguised by publishing an article under her name, and perfidiously hid her True Purpose by making the article available to anyone running a search using... her name.

OMIGOD, she published an article about a separate subject taking a position that a lot of people on the right might dislike, therefore, she is wrong about contraception, and a fraud! Also she believes things that people on the right don't like! How... something proof of something!

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I'm waiting for the conservatives to blame the slut prosititute woman for killing Breitbart.

Dear God, Please Blow Me

Pat Robertson: Prayer Could Have Stopped the Tornadoes

The equally ridiculous flip side is that some of what the phony Christians like Robertson pray for mighta caused them.

Springsteen takes aim at robber barons and bankers

Kos on Springsteen's new album, links at site.

But "Death to My Hometown" has company on Wrecking Ball as a political song. As on so many earlier Springsteen albums, Wrecking Ball is populated by characters speaking to us, telling their stories. Those stories were never as bright and hopeful as their often-anthemic settings made casual or careless listeners think, but they've gotten darker and again, point a finger at the causes of the darkness. In "Jack of All Trades," a man lists all the jobs he does in the effort to survive, assuring that "I'm a jack of all trades, honey, we'll be all right." But despite that reassurance, despite the comforting (or defeated? we can't quite tell) tone and the litany of work he can and will do, this struggle for survival has context—"The banker man grows fatter, the working man grows thin"—and, if at the time those lines are delivered they sound resigned, two verses later, the speaker voices his anger—"If I had me a gun, I'd find the bastards and shoot 'em on sight."

I will be getting this album.

Lakotas arrested halting Keystone XL pipeline trucks

the narcosphere

An action alert was sent out shortly before the arrests: "Calling all Lakota men on the Pine Ridge Reservation to come to Wanblee, South Dakota." The alert said "Pipeline trucks are being held there at the border by our Lakota Oyate, Oglala Sioux Tribal Police and State Troopers in an effort to keep them from entering our territory. Even the state troopers told the trucks they have to turn around and cannot bring their pipeline or other materials on to our reservation."

"Pipeline trucks are refusing to turn around claiming they have corporate rights that supersede any other law." Reports from the scene say that the trucks are being allowed to pass, as Lakotas are being arrested attempting to halt the trucks from entering their sovereign territory."

One sentence bears repeating:

"Pipeline trucks are refusing to turn around claiming they have corporate rights that supersede any other law."

There ya go. One of the biggest problems we've got in a nutshell.

"Must Read" of the Day

An open letter to the people who hate Obama more than they love America

Sample:

You like war. You like torture. You like Jesus. I don't know how in the hell any of that is compatible, but no one ever accused you haters of being over-committed to ideological consistency. You like people who look like you or at least hate most of the things that you hate. You hate everything else.

Yes ...

This is what young Americans are fighting and dying for:

Women are subordinate to men, should not mix in work or education and must always have a male guardian when they travel, according to new guidelines from Afghanistan's top clerics which critics say are dangerously reminiscent of the Taliban era.

The edicts appeared in a statement that also encouraged insurgents to join peace talks, fuelling fears that efforts to negotiate an end to a decade of war, now gathering pace after years of false starts and dead ends, will come at a high cost to women.

"There is a link with what is happening all over the country with peace talks and the restrictions they want to put on women's rights," said Afghan MP Fawzia Koofi, who warned that the new rules were a "green light for Talibanisation".

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It's time to leave these goat fuckers in the 12th Century and get the fuck out. To quote the Chimp before we went into that god forsaken shithole "We are not in the business of building nations". Sorry, but these people had over a decade to get it together and they haven't made the effort. Loyalty can still be bought as easily as it was when the Soviets were there and these people don't want a central government; never have, never will. They don't want democracy, they don't want technology, and they don't want to know about anything but their parochial needs and their subservience to Allah (seems they have a different Allah than the Muslims I know but that's another post).

Fuck this shit. It's time to get out and let them go back to beating their women, raping their children, and killing each other over insults. It's 10 years on and if it was gonna happen, it would have happened already. It's never gonna happen.

Really?

How stupid do you have to be to come up with something like this? Did some idiot actually think it was a good idea to alienate everybody who might vote for them before November?

Before you can join the Laurens County Republican Party in South Carolina and get on the primary ballot, they ask that you pledge that you’ve never ever had pre-marital sex — and that you will never ever look at porn again.

Last Tuesday, the LCGOP unanimously adopted a resolution that would ask all candidates who want to get on the primary ballot to sign a pledge with 28 principles, because the party “does not want to associate with candidates who do not act and speak in a manner that is consistent with the SC Republican Party Platform.”

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Half these Republican guys can't get it up without looking at porn.

How to Make Siri Curse Like a Sailor

Heh. Gizmodo again, this time on the creepiest disembodied voice since HAL. With a decidedly NSFW video!

Getting bored with Siri? Us too. Finding out what the weather is, setting reminders and asking question gets old. You know what never gets old? Hearing a robot voice curse. I mean, we're all teenage boys at heart, right? Here's how to make Siri curse like a motherfucking sailor.
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Siri won't respond with an f-bomb if you curse at her but she will call you whatever you tell her to call you. So if you replace your name with Mr. Dickfuck Shitlicker Damnbitch Asshole, she'll call you just that.

More.

Here's a good one:

Have you all seen that annoying "Rock God" Apple iPhone commercial? I fixed it.

Thanks to 106.3 The Buzz.

From The Buzz:

When I first saw that commercial, I looked over at my wife and said, “So that’s now ‘Nickelback’ got started!”

Heh.

My sides, they hurt...

Gizmodo

The Montgomery County (Texas) Sheriff's Office had a big day planned. After becoming the first department in the country with its own aerial drone ($300,000!), they were ready for a nice photo op. And then the drone crashed into a SWAT team.
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"[The] prototype drone was flying about 18-feet off the ground when it lost contact with the controller's console on the ground. It's designed to go into an auto shutdown mode...but when it was coming down the drone crashed into the SWAT team's armored vehicle."
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It's no wonder we're not able to find a video of this spectacular publicity failure.

No shit!

Good thing it didn't crash into the local Dunkin Donut shop. Woulda got a buncha cops with one one round. Heh.

Headline of the Day

Gingrich Bets Big Oil Will ‘Crater The Economy’ To Defeat Obama

They're trying. They will fail. Nice of Neutie to say it out loud though.

Bootstraps ...

And all that:

Despite the Republicans' continual insistance that climate change isn't a real phenomenon, the tornado season started a full month earlier than most years in the Midwest. To date, there have been 46 confirmed deaths.

Wide swaths of the Midwest have been destroyed, leaving American people to pick up the battered pieces of their lives and rebuild.

But Governor John Kasich has just made it that much harder for Ohioans to do just that:

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We don't need federal disaster aid. Look at all that busted up lumber laying around. All you need to do is buy some nails and a hammer and you can build some sort of shelter. Grab them bootstraps and start pulling, Ohio.

The stupid ...

It burns.

Since when ...

Did Israel become the 51st State?

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Is Netanyahu taking heat from U.S. legislators for publicly disrespecting Obama? Are you kidding? Congress is too busy bowing to the American Israel Public Affairs Committee, the pro-Israel lobbying group, which just happens to be meeting in Washington this weekend.

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I tell ya, were I the President (or Emperor), I would do a "Kennedy-to-the-Moon" and demand a full conversion to renewable energy by the end of the decade. Then, I would kiss the Middle East off, Arab and Israeli alike, and tell them to settle it among themselves. If they all end up killing each other? Oh well ...

Update:

Yeah, let's start another war anyway. What the fuck is wrong with these people?

Repug talking points

Stolen from my own FB page after stealing it from several others.



Yeah, that oughta work...

The nation's business ...

My ass:

Stolen from the Being Liberal FB page.

Word ...

Drifty:

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If this is your first exposure to American Conservatism, what you must understand is that ever since they got bent over the barrel at Appomattox Courthouse and forced to surrender on terms set by the Union devils, Southern White bigots have made it a point of honor never to apologize for any of the loathsome, depraved, anti-American things they say and do, but to instead stand proudly up for their heritage as inbred, rage-drunk, racist shitbags.

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The Jukebox in my mind ...

What went through my head when I heard about Rush Lintball's 'apology':

Pat Benatar - Little Too Late