Time to Elect the Worst Idea

Gail Collins on "Americans Elect" which is the dumbest idea I've heard of to elect a POTUS. Maybe it would work in a world full of peace, love, dope, rainbows, and unicorns, but in that world we wouldn't need politicians anyway.

Our topic today is picking the worst new trend of the political season.

Not including putting the dog on the car roof.
...

But since I still have some space here, let me throw in a plug for the terribleness of the idea of Americans Elect.

And throw in a plug she does. Cut to the chase:

The thing that makes our current politics particularly awful isn’t procedural. It’s that the Republican Party has become over-the-top extreme. You can try to fix that by working from within to groom a more sensible pack of future candidates, or from without by voting against the Republicans’ nominees until they agree to shape up.

Door No. 2, Bob. Fire for effect, repeat, repeat, repeat!

Blow the nice officer a kiss...

The Rude Pundit on the latest SCOTUS intrusion into our lives:

You know what? It doesn't matter what the case was about. Here's the outcome of Florence v. Board of Chosen Freeholders (in New Jersey's Essex County): if you are stopped by police and you have a few too many parking tickets, even if it's a mistake, you can be arrested and, if going to be placed in the jail, strip-searched by the police. Don't worry, though, the Supreme Court says, because the cops can't touch you, but they may ask you to lift your nutsack so they can see if you have drugs under there.

Playing the fucking fool, Justice Anthony "Swings Both Ways, But Hangs to the Right" Kennedy says that the lawyers of the plaintiff, a poor bastard who got chewed up by our incarceration nation mentality, didn't even really define "strip search," despite there being, you know, a definition offered in police manuals.

That last part wasn't really germane but I just had to get "Swings Both Ways, But Hangs to the Right" in there. Heh.

Mr. Florence got the shaft on this deal and spent six days in two different county jails because of a clerical fuckup over a traffic fine he paid that didn't show up as paid and there was a warrant out on him. He had proof he'd paid it but the cops didn't give a shit. Every time he changed police and correctional officer hands, he got strip searched. Did I mention he's Afro-American? White cops just know every black man they stop has a machine gun up his ass. Or they just want to humiliate him because they can.

Cops probably won't strip search you by the side of the road, or even usually when you get to jail. If you're white.

I've been strip searched. I've been in jail a coupla times, and the rules permitted me to be a trusty and thus eligible for working parties out in the community. If you have to be in jail, that's what makes it bearable. The civilians you work for treat you very well with food and smokes. They appreciate your help.

You change clothes from the skin out when you return to jail after the work day. Our county jail is in a small town and the inmates know people and there's a slight chance that the youngbloods will score a little dope and try to bring it in but I don't think it happens very often. Most guys aren't that stupid and don't want to get busted back to the regular lockup. Usually if dope appears they snort or smoke it on the spot. The C.O.s check yer junk but they don't give you a blood or urine test.

I decided to have fun with the strip search. Believe you me, fun is hard to come by in the hoosegow and stuff that wouldn't be fun anywhere else is uproarious!

Let's say there's six guys on the work party. They line you up and go down the line like a short-arm inspection (without the "milk 'er down" feature) in the Corps. Apparently a lotta dope (weapons?) gets smuggled in under foreskins because you peel that back for 'em. They tell you to lift up yer nutsack - in my case, "just past yer knees is fine, gramps" - and then you turn around, bend over, and spread yer cheeks. Yeah, like this old man scored a pound of crank and keestered it into jail fer chrissakes. (I do know a fellow who could keester a claw hammer, but that's another story). I think the cops find more cell phones these days than dope. The jail pay phone is damn expensive.

But I digress. Point is, I tried to have fun with it. I looked back at the cop and grinned and grabbed both cheeks and yanked them apart. I did my best to flex my asshole and make it wink. Shit, if I coulda got it to whistle "Dixie" I would have. It made the cop laugh which is always good. One caution: shooting sparks at the officer is probably not a good idea. Heh.

That cop was there every day. I don't envy him having to do that, but reason prevailed. I guess he decided that either I wasn't a danger and wouldn't try to smuggle in the explosives and/or anthrax I'd scored whilst trimming the hedges at the Elks Club, or else looking up my butt was just too horrible to contemplate, because he never asked me to do that again. I like to think it was the latter option.

Jail is a unique situation. I would never do that at Walmart although I've been tempted to...

It'll be over ...

If the Frothy Mixture can't win it all today (which the polls say he cant).

Another batch of Republican National Convention delegates will be allocated on Tuesday as voters in Wisconsin, Maryland and Washington, D.C. make their picks for the GOP nominee.

...

It's just a matter of whether he's self-aware enough to drop out gracefully. It's obvious Noot is no longer a factor and if he could bring himself to admit he's out, he would. I will say that this 2012 Clown Car has been one of the most entertaining in my memory. I'm gonna miss that collection of idiots.

Glutton for punishment ...

I'm beginning to think I'm a closet masochist (probably a determining factor in being a progressive blogger for almost 8 years) because in addition to everything else I'm in the middle of, I decided it's a good time to build a deck in the backyard. I'll elaborate later on but since I'm effectively out of the dad-in-law house sale (aside from lifting heavy shit), I figured I'd take the week the Mrs. is in Charlotte, NC (next week) on business and do the deck project I've been meaning to do for the last couple years. I'm using this system and I ordered up 120 of them this morning from Lowe's. After I take the dogs for shots tomorrow morning, I'm going to Home Depot and put in my lumber order. I should order some extra and build a box so when I drop dead out there, the Mrs. can make the dogs dig a hole and they can drag my carcass in it. Heh ...

Unleash ...

The Mittster!

GREEN BAY, Wis.—Mitt Romney has long been criticized for being awkward on the stump, but his wife, Ann, defended her husband in a radio interview today, rejecting a host's statement that Romney is "too stiff" on the campaign trail.

Per ABC News' Emily Friedman, Ann Romney told Baltimore WBAL radio that she's working to show another side of her husband. Asked about criticism that Romney is "too stiff," Ann Romney laughed and replied, "I guess we better unzip him and let the real Mitt Romney out because he is not!"

...

Honey, I coulda told you he was a limp dick years ago.

Charlie Pierce is racist!

Or at least, that's what the town drunk Ann Althouse says (Who knew she was still alive?). The Duchess of the Wine Box thinks that calling Antonin "Fat Tony" Scalia "Tony" is racist because that's not his nickname*. I still don't know why Thers amuses himself with her but hey, we all have our little entertainments (mine is sitting in a public place seeing how many women wear the wrong bra).

...

You may be inclined to consider this ridiculous. However, Shocking Footage has emerged of an enraged Pierce hurling barrels at an innocent Italian plumber, probably because Pierce suspected the little fellow is Catholic:

...

Oh the Humanity! You'd think Pierce shot Tony on a February night as he was heading home from the store with Skittles and iced tea.

*My first name is Richard and I don't go by "Dick" (unless it's a woman prefacing it with "Give me some of that big") but that sure as hell doesn't stop people from using that moniker (sometimes justified, heh ...).

Why ...

Is this not terrorism?

A small, homemade bomb exploded outside a Planned Parenthood office in Wisconsin on Sunday night, prompting a federal investigation and the swift condemnation of violence by a Republican presidential candidate ahead of the state’s primary on Tuesday.

...

The Frothy Mixture denounced it (good for him) but I'm certain he doesn't realize (or care) that he and his fellow Jesus-freaks are the ones who get these fundamentalist idiots riled up. When a fundie like Santorum rails against Planned Parenthood as if it's some kind of abortionplex, when they say abortion is tantamount to murder, and when they say using birth control is a sin, it is inevitable that some on the fringe will take it as license to go after the "murderers". It would be nice if Homeland Security would classify these right wing nutjobs as terrorists, but that classification is only for brown Muslim folks who they want to send to Gitmo. If you're a Christian and you blow up a public building, you're a "misguided patriot". Maybe we should round them all up and send them on a "Cuban vacation" for a while.

Heh ...

Stolen from God's FB page.

Mitt-mentum

Willard is the perfect Repug candidate for this election cycle. The still-not-any-good-but-better-than-him candidates laid chilly on this one because they knew the teabagger radicals were going to lose this race to the O-Man for them. Why waste a good candidate?

April Fool!

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) April 1, 2012 – In an April Fool's Day announcement that took the political world by storm, the Republican Party revealed today that its entire presidential race had been an elaborate prank.
...

Former Godfather's Pizza CEO Herman Cain agreed that the prank had gone well, but added, "I'm just amazed that the American people never figured out we were kidding."

"I mean, I kept saying ‘9-9-9' every four seconds, which was total and utter bullshit," he said. "And everything out of Michele's mouth made her sound like a mental patient."

"True that," Rep. Bachmann agreed.

Texas Governor Rick Perry said he worried that "every time I screwed up at a debate people would figure out I was pulling their legs," but added, "The American people seemed to accept the idea that a Governor of Texas could be a blithering idiot."

When one reporter mentioned that Rep. Ron Paul (R-TX) was not at the press conference, a sudden silence fell over the gathering.

"Did anyone ever tell Ron this was supposed to be a prank?" Mr. Romney asked. "Holy cow, maybe he's really serious."

Ha. Fucking. Ha. Next time do something funny instead of mean-spirited and pathetic.

Nevada County Selected for Agenda 21 Project by UN

My county! Subhead:

Tea Party/CABPRO Activists Have a Conniption

Heh. Fuck 'em.

YubaNet

GENEVA/NEVADA CITY, Calif. April 1, 2012 - Nevada County's sluggish economic recovery will receive a substantial boost, thanks to an application submitted several years ago by a group of non-profits focused on sustainable living and development. The UN's Conference on Sustainable Development (UNCSD or Rio +20) just released the list of counties chosen to receive advanced planning and investment help. Nevada County was selected as the only rural county in California. Other counties selected throughout the US include Maricopa, Arizona - Madison, Wisconsin - Collin County, Texas - Utah County, Utah and Broward, Florida.

The reaction from the wingtards comes as no surprise:

Sue McGuire, also running for District 1, didn't want to comment on the record at first. But, after hearing that the UN was involved, she didn't hold back: "This is socialism, pure and simple. Agenda 21 is a danger to the American way of life and I will fight this. Our community doesn't need UN troops and black helicopters. Thankfully, our strong opposition will send this communist plot back to where it belongs, to the trash heap that is the UN headquarters." She pointed to the local Republican party's resolution Exposing United Nations Agenda 21, saying she fully supported the resolution.

She probably thinks all the helicopters flying around in the woods doing logging* operations are the UN's advance force. The Repugs that are for Agenda 21 think it's a real estate company. Heh.

*

Ask someone in heli-logging how business is going and they will inevitably answer, “Up and down.”

I love living in Nevada County. Note to the "blue helmets": Coffee's always on, boys. Stop on by. English is not a requirement.

Headline of the Day

Man whose WMD lies led to 100,000 deaths confesses all

There need to be a few hundred more deaths over this. In the USA. By hanging.

Why Overturning ‘Obamacare’ Could Lead To Single-Payer

First, in a spate of shameless blogwhoring, go read my earlier take on single-payer. Roostin' dirt and tubs o' beer will likely not play a major role in "Medicare For All" but my heart's in the right place.

TPM

“Conservatives may find that they weren’t careful about what they wished for in opposing ‘Obamacare,’” Adam Winkler, a constitutional law professor at UCLA School of Law, told TPM. “The economic, social and political pressure for health care reform aren’t going to just disappear. There’s a reason every major industrialized country has national health care. If the Supreme Court invalidates the Affordable Care Act, we are likely to see a government takeover of health care in the next decade.”

In that scenario, progressives could turn to two alternatives that have proven successful at lowering costs in other countries: A single-payer plan a la Medicare but for everyone, or a two-tier system in which private and public insurers compete. Both concepts are anathema to Republicans, but their constitutionality is not in doubt — and the GOP has been unable to devise a replacement plan, which could give liberals ammunition for their cause.

There’s little doubt that the idea behind the individual mandate — in which Americans either buy insurance or pay more in taxes — would be constitutional if rewritten explicitly as a “tax” as opposed to a “penalty” for not buying a product. But the political fallout of a Supreme Court decision to strike it down may well scare lawmakers away from the concept altogether.

“The defenders of federalism will be rewarded with an even bigger federal government,” Winkler said. “Wouldn’t that be ironic?”

The time for "healthcare for profit, available to those who can pay through the nose" is starting to be seen for the scam it is and the time for "healthcare as public utility, available to all" is nearly upon us. As it should be. It will still be a long time coming.

Update:

GOP Attorney General Suing Over Obamacare Supports Single-Payer: ‘I Trust The Government More’

“I trust the government more than insurance companies.” Caldwell went on to endorse the idea of a single-payer health care system, saying it’d “be a whole lot better” than Obamacare:

KEYES: You don’t think the subsidies for low-income people are going to be helpful?

CALDWELL: No, no. The worst thing you can do is give it to an insurance company. I want to make my point. All insurance companies are controlled in their particular state. If you have a hurricane come up the east coast, the first one that’s going to leave you when they gotta pay too many claims is an insurance company. Insurance companies are the absolute worst people to handle this kind of business. I trust the government more than insurance companies. If the government wants to put forth a policy where they will pay for everything and you won’t have to go through an insurance policy, that’d be a whole lot better.

One realistic Repug. Not nearly enough but it's a start.

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

Santorum Open to VP Position
Says he'd be proud to serve under liberal flip-flopping no-better-than-Obama Romney.

When pigs fly...

Apple CEO Tours Foxconn Plant, Asks for Changes
Calls for shorter hours, higher pay, then flies to Philippines to shop for cheaper factory.

Chocolate Good For You
According to studies that always appear right before Easter, Halloween and Valentine's Day.

Supreme Court to Release Health Care Decision in Late June
You might want to get your annual checkup by then.

64 years ...

Worth of stuff. That's how long my in-laws were together and it seems like they never threw anything out. The Mrs. and I started the task of going through dad-in-law's place this weekend in preparation to put it up for sale. I can't believe how much stuff they'd accumulated in that time and the things they thought were worth saving. I understand it; they were children of the Great Depression (just as my parents were) and had the "you never know when it might come in handy" mentality. It's close to being overwhelming. Gonna have to get a really big dumpster.

Let's see ...

You treat women like chattel. You would deny women access to vital health care. You would deny women eminance over their own bodies and decisions. Is there any wonder why the GOP is losing the female vote?

...

Pew research and other polling organizations have shown that there has been a growing gender gap on the presidential level, with President Obama doing better with women against his likely rival in former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney than the President did against Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) at the same point in 2008. But other recent numbers show the presidential race isn’t the only one being affected.

It’s one point both Democrats and Republicans agree on: social issues at the top of the ticket are poisoning the well and creating a gender gap across the board — mostly to the benefit of Democrats.

...

I guess the cracker bastids who run the show over there that the women of America will accept a return to the 1950s without complaint or disagreement. I got news for you, they've "come a long way, baby" and they ain't gonna give it up without a fight. Good luck with that.

More slime ...

Why doesn't this surprise me?

...

The founder of Beef Products, known for its production of "pink slime," is a major donor to Mitt Romney.

...

It seems we have a word that can describe the GOP succinctly.

Slime is slime ...

No matter how you dress it up. Perfesser Krugman on Paul Ryan's "almost inconceivably cruel" budget plan:

...

And when I say fraudulent, I mean just that. The trouble with the budget devised by Paul Ryan, the chairman of the House Budget Committee, isn’t just its almost inconceivably cruel priorities, the way it slashes taxes for corporations and the rich while drastically cutting food and medical aid to the needy. Even aside from all that, the Ryan budget purports to reduce the deficit — but the alleged deficit reduction depends on the completely unsupported assertion that trillions of dollars in revenue can be found by closing tax loopholes.

...

I can't believe average Americans are still buying this guy's bullshit but, like we say in the car business, "there's an ass for every seat".

Great thanks to our pal Montag for the link.

Headline of the Day

George W. Bush Breaks from Partisan Politics, Endorses Barack Obama for 2012

Republican Presidential Candidate Target Practice

Via email from my old school pal Barb. .45 hole. Heh.