50 Suggestions for John McCain's VP Shortlist

Will Durst

6. JEB BUSH. Ups the Bush streak to seven of last eight GOP tickets.

19. FRED THOMPSON. Throws a bone to the conservative wing and makes candidate appear vibrant.

23. HILLARY CLINTON. Wants it so bad, she'd cross the aisle for death- watch slot.

28. TOM CRUISE. Scientologists are to Republicans what vegans are to hippies.

38. KEIFER SUTHERLAND. What right winger doesn't love Jack Bauer? Torture question becomes moot.

41. WILLIE NELSON. You have any idea of what percentage of this country smokes pot?

45. KARL ROVE. Assassination insurance.

47. DONALD RUMSFELD. See Karl Rove.

48. NEWT GINGRICH. See Karl Rove.