At Donna's Ranch, a brothel in Wells, Nev., most of the customers are long-haul truckers. High fuel and food prices have drained them of 'play money.' So the working girls sit and wait.
Signs of the economic free fall have cropped up in many of Nevada's 25 or so legal brothels. The Mustang Ranch, for example, has a steady stream of customers, but the number of women vying for work has soared. Even a 74-year-old applied. This summer, the Shady Lady gave $50 gas cards to those who spent $300. The Moonlite Bunny Ranch offered extras to customers paying with their economic stimulus checks.
David Zett, a long-hauler from Loretta, Wis., gulps a Miller Genuine Draft and bashes oil companies: "They've got you over a barrel and can do whatever they want to you, and they don't even kiss you when they're done."
"Just like this place," Hargis says.
"No," Zett says. "They kiss you."
From 2006 to 2007, the brothel's revenue climbed 7.6%, to about $1 million. This year, Arnold expects to make about $200,000 less. Closing that gap is tricky: Brothel advertising is legal, but billboards and bus ads risk upsetting neighbors. So the bordello sponsors a soccer team in Boise and a rodeo in Wells. It also bought lights for the high school football field and gave local motels pens, which boast that Donna's is "Your Biggest Bang for the Buck."
Free beer. Free chili. Free shower. SOUVENIRS.
Now yer talkin'!
Wells NV is a town (to be charitable about it) of about 1500 out in the middle of nowhere. The nearest town of any, say again any, size is Elko and the nearest city is Salt Lake City about 150 miles away. Except for SLC, Donna's local customer base is approximately zip-point-zilch.
I have a suggestion. Donna's should offer senior citizen early-bird specials. They'll understand why they should start early after the first one. Heh. Us ol' farts take a little, er, coaxin'.
Maybe bus tours. There's plenty of senior gambling bus tours, why not a Dirty Ol' Man Brothel Bus? It only has to happen once a month, on the fourth Wednesday. That's when we get our Social Security checks.
And don't expect the same guys every month. The older fellas gotta, er, save up for that stuff.
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