Thursday, January 24, 2013

You and me, Nuge

It's a slow day so pardon me for once again giving this asshole nobody space. It's Bob Cesca's fault. Heh. Many links at site.

Yes, Nugent not only threatened the president again, but he implied that he and his "buddies" would stage some sort of geriatric armed revolt if the president continues to push for new gun safety laws. I used the phrase "another chat" because this is the second time in less than a year that Nugent has popped off with some sort of not-so-subtle threat against the president. Rewind back to April, 2012 when Nugent said at the annual NRA Convention, "If Barack Obama becomes the president in November, I will either be dead or in jail by this time next year." The Secret Service responded to that one by paying a visit to Nugent's compound. Oh, and you might recall how, at a concert back in 2007, Nugent said that Barack Obama can "suck on my machine gun."

Yes, one of the gun culture's A-list spokesmen -- and a Republican campaign prop.
A-list? Really?! Asshole? Anachronism? Anarchist?

So here's what he said at the SHOT Show last week via a video attained by Media Matters:

I'm part of a very great experiment in self-government where we the people determine our own pursuit of happiness and our own individual freedom and liberty not to be confused with the Barack Obama gang who believes in we the sheeple and actually is attempting to re-implement the tyranny of King George that we escaped from in 1776. And if you want another Concord Bridge, I got some buddies.

Do we have to go over this again? Nugent and his buddies would be utterly wiped out. Full stop. Actually, they might as well be threatening to ride velociraptors into the White House, armed with magic wands and accompanied by Space Monkey Gleek. It's just that ridiculous. The whole notion of an armed revolt and secession from the United States failed miserably in 1865, and the revolutionaries at that time were headed by skilled West Point commanders like J.E.B. Stuart and Robert E. Lee who directed massive armies. These gun nutjobs today have -- who? -- octogenarian D-list electric guitar player Ted Nugent and a gaggle of his redneck disciples. Good luck, boys.

In fact, you know what? Bring it on. Seriously. I'd like to see Nugent try his hand at something like this -- to actually follow through on one of his kneejerk treasonous threats. But considering how he chickened out of the Vietnam draft, we can safely assume that Nugent prefers to only shoot at things that don't fire back.
Note to Nuge: Your "buddies" won't show up anyway, so I got an idea - you and me, Nuge. One on one. We're both old farts so it'd be even. No guns, just you and me. Oh, and a few TV crews to document you saving the nation from the likes of me.

Besides, it'll be fun for the country to watch you get your mouth shut once and for all - swollen shut for a while, anyway - by a godless commie fuck pussy liberal. One who also avoided the draft. By enlisting instead of shittin' his pants.


It occured to me that if Nuge's dick was as big as his mouth, he could be a porn star. Then it further dawned on me that he could be a porn star anyway. With that mouth he could take an even bigger porn star, if you get my drift. If he could find one that would stick it in a garbage hole.


montag said...

We still have 79 days for Teddy to keep his promise of being dead or in jail. I would prefer your way. Network or Pay-per-View? Maybe you could use one of his animal shooting pens and call it a cage match.

David Aquarius said...

He'd fold like bad poker hand. These type of nutcases have way more mouth than mettle. Call them on their tough talk and they'll do everything (including dropping a load in their tighty whities) to weasel out of it.

Once out of danger, the lip flapping will resume.

Unless their lips get broken!

Syrbal/Labrys said...

Nugent is too chickenshit to do anything without his tiny-dick-compensation Gun present. Everyone assumes "rock stars" of most stripes are loud-mouthed attention whores, but Nugent is just an attention slut who does it for free.

CAFKIA said...

Gordo you will rise to the top of my shit list if I should hear about you dismantling that turd into it's constituent parts without me.

I'll admit it, whenever I think about his claim of being dead or in prison ... I'm torn. I lean towards death but then, I think about the life such a pussy would have in prison. I suppose compromise is the best way so, I'm thinking he should be in prison for at least two years before his (painful) demise.

Yea I know, I'm a bad liberal today.

Gordon said...

You guys are all on the invitation list as honored guests. I think it will be a very short bout which will probably begin and end with my best drill field "BOO!". :-)

Grung_e_Gene said...

"I like Ted Nugent. He’s a friend of mine.” - Sean Hannity

Chicken Hawks of a Feather Flock Together.

Hannity and Nugent share so many traits, Chicken Hawk, Cowards, Domestic Terrorists, Child Rapists...

Well, to be fair to Sean he isn't an avowed child rapist like Ted.

CAFKIA said...

Well, to be fair to Sean he isn't an avowed child rapist like Ted.

Absence of evidence is NOT evidence of absence.

Anonymous said...

Gordon, didn't Ted Nugent win a Silver Star in Vietnam or something like that? Oh, wait, I'm wrong. He's the one who messed his pants to avoid wearing the uniform. Funny how it's always THAT kind that are the bravest. ;)

Jay in N.C.

wkmaier said...

I fully approve of this post. :-)