Friday, March 27, 2009

Historic water. And I was there...grrrr

The Yew-nited States Marine Corps did something yesterday that they haven't done for over forty years: they pissed me off. Not the frustrated, disappointed, goddammit-who's-runnin'-this-chickenshit-outfit kind of pissed off that ya couldn't do nothin' about back then anyway because they owned your young ass, but the smoldering, fuming kind ya can't do nothin' about either.

I was reading my dead tree copy of Time magazine and ran across an ad with a Marine Corps emblem. I'm still brainwashed, so I read it. It was colorful, but I couldn't find it to reproduce it for you. Here's the money shot:

Live or work at Camp Lejeune before 1987?

Well, hell yeah I did! Way before 1987. 1965-'66, when men were men and rifles had wood in 'em!

You may have been exposed to contaminated drinking water.

Register with the Marine Corps by calling (877) 261-9782 Mon-Fri 8:30 am to 5:00 or by going online to

Well, I'm a little leery about 'registering with the Marine Corps'. Been there, done that, got the scars to prove it, but I figured what could possibly go wrong? Hell, I was probably there before water contamination was invented. So I went and 'registered'. Hit the link and go see.

Turns out the time period involved is from 1957-1987, so I was there. I'm not too worried - I didn't drink much water in those days. Beer was cheap and legal for 18-year-olds. I drank the bug juice in the mess hall, but GI koolaid would kill anything, drank water in the field but if the iodine pills didn't kill the bad stuff, the godawful water buffaloes and plastic canteens sure would have, to judge by the taste of the stuff.

So, the Marine Corps is trying to keep me apprised of something that may or may not have happened over forty years ago. That's nice of them. So why am I pissed off to the spring-loaded position?

The effort is called the "Camp Lejeune Historic Drinking Water" project.

Now, around the Brain here, Fixer kids me all the time about my age, calls me 'old man' and stuff like that. While I must admit that when God said 'let there be light!' I was the Duty NCO who threw the switch, I can kid him back with stuff like him not being old enough to have had any nookie with his pants all the way off yet. It goes back and forth, tit for tat. We're both smartass smokers 'n jokers who like one another, and it's all very good-natured. Builds unit cohesion and hopefully entertains people. I like it. It's fun.

But whaddya do when an outfit you revere and gave some of your best years to and came of age in lumps ya in with Old Ironsides (pretty good duty station, btw) by calling the water they gave you to drink 'historic'?

I got this chair I'm sittin' in rockin' so fast in frustration it's startin' ta clank and smoke a little...

Please consider this geezer rant a PSA for those similarly afflicted affected by duty at Lejeune.

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