Tuesday, August 9, 2011

President Obama's Imaginary Friend

The Rude Pundit lays out what a whole buncha folks are thinking.

It's as if Obama has created this imaginary friend called "Mr. Nice the Elephant," and he's so happy to have Mr. Nice the Elephant around to play with that he just wants everyone to know about Mr. Nice the Elephant. He may as well have said, "Mr. Nice the Elephant and I come up with great ideas all the time. We should all have a pal as terrific as Mr. Nice the Elephant. Isn't that true, Mr. Nice? He says it's true. You just can't hear him, but I can."

Mr. Nice the Elephant is fuckin' awesome. He'll sit down at a table with you and tell you how grand a bargain you can come up with. He'll tell you not to worry about all those meanie rogue elephants out there. Mr. Nice will take care of them. He'll teach 'em all to be nice, like him, Mr. Nice the Elephant.

It's as if nearly all of us are watching Jim DeMint and Rand Paul and Eric Cantor and Michele Bachmann and other nutzoids raping Uncle Sam and Lady Liberty and skull-fucking Ted Kennedy's dead head with Ronald Reagan's femur and calling that compromise. And we're all yelling, "Hey, could someone stop them from doing all that? It's really bad." And then Obama says to us, "Well, guess Uncle Sam shouldn't have bent over to pick up that beard soap in the shower. It's his problem because he thinks getting ass-raped is bad. Why is he drawing a line in the sand over the fucking of his anus? Gosh, Mr. Nice, that's not very nice of Uncle Sam."

The Democratic point of view is so degraded right now in the country that people keep telling the Rude Pundit, "But..but...the majority of Democrats support the debt deal." That's because Democrats actually understood that if you didn't raise the debt ceiling, the zombie recession would have risen even more viciously hungry. That's because, if we take John Boehner at his word that he got 98% of what he wanted, Democrats are happy they got 2% and Republicans are angry that they negotiated 2% away.

Just as an aside, the 98% of what Boner wanted that he got was to keep his fucking JOB.

Here's the question the Rude Pundit would like to ask this President who keeps on attempting to appear post-partisan, who refuses to lay the dead bald eagle at the feet of the people with the gun: "Would you have been elected if you had run as a Republican? No? Then maybe you should lead like you need to defeat the fuckers who want to defeat you."

(Note: That last part presumes a level of hope and bravado that may not be possible at this moment.)

Am I disappointed with the way Obama is doing his job? Hell yes.

Am I going to waddle on down to the polling place with my panties all in a bunch and vote for him as a "closet Repug" to try to keep a real ideological ass-rapin' Repug outta the White House? Hell yes. It ain't about me and how I feel. It's a helluva lot more important than that.


Fixer said...

... ass-rapin' Repug ...

The only difference is that Barry uses lube and takes longer strokes.

casey said...

Hello Rude Pundit,

I disagree. I would rather end the union with the Rethugs in charge by chanting up Uncle Wetherbee. I was a rather a young fan when I first heard his weather forecasts. I heard his comments on that unfortunate day. It has stuck with me even to today. I wanted it to be accurate so I looked it up(Casey Stengel was heard saying this). On November 24, 1976, his weather spot came up just after a report of a violent rape of a five year old girl. Tex, who had only been aware of the topic of the report, and not the fact that a child was involved, thereupon quipped: "With rape so predominant in the news lately, it is well to remember the words of Confucius: 'If rape is inevitable, lie back and enjoy it.'" That is what we are getting from both sides. why try holding on to something that is not there. Time to lie back and if possible enjoy it.

mandt said...

Great minds! and synchronicity!