BEST COSTUME: Rick Santorum for that winning period look- subtly harkening back to a young Mr. Rogers with rabies.
BEST CHOREOGRAPHY: Grover Norquist.
THE “OH MY GOD, NOT YOU AGAIN” AWARD: Whoever decided contraception made for a good election year wedge issue.
BEST BOY: Marcus Bachmann.
BEST ENSEMBLE IN A MUSICAL OR COMEDY: The entire Republican Party Presidential Nomination cast.
BEST ACTOR: Body of work award goes to Speaker of the House John Boehner for various portrayals as outraged defender of fiscal responsibility, obstinate party stalwart and sophisticated gentleman to whom gracious cooperation is of the highest priority and doing it all while orange.
BEST DIRECTION: The Koch Brothers.