When pigs fly. Hell, if they drafted those ying-yangs, they'd take their doctors with 'em to get out of it . . .
I'll go these warmongers one better. If Jonah Goldberg makes the attempt to enlist, so will I. I'll dust off my DD Form 214 and head down to the recruiters the same day. Regardless of the fact I already served this country for 8 years (6 active, 2 reserve), I'll go back if the man who said he'd serve (if he didn't have a family and a job) gave it his best shot. Come on, Jonah, let's sign up as buddies. Lotsa guys did it when I went in. If you go, I'll go with ya. And I even promise not to kill ya, even if the opportunity presents itself. If ya signed up, I'd have too much respect for you to want to snap your soft spine with my bare hands. So here's the deal. If Jonah goes, I'll go too. Whaddaya say, Lardass? Are ya man enough to take me up on it? Let me know.