Thursday, May 10, 2007

Chuck E. Cheese Legislation

Welcome to Pottersville

Years ago when the kids were small we'd take them to Chuck E. Cheese in Natick, MA. It was there that I learned an invaluable tip on parenting.

My wife would dole out two or three dollars in tokens to each of the three kids and they'd invariably pester us for more every ten or fifteen minutes. So I asked her why she didn't give them more tokens at a time and she said, "So they'll keep checking in."

Isn't this basically what Congress has been reduced to doing with George W. Bush with the war funding bill? We're giving George his hundred billion in video game tokens for that kewl Iraq War arcade game ("Oil Wars", I think it's called) to which he's been addicted for the last four plus years on the condition that he not get into any more mischief. In other words, from here on in, he has to earn his war. There was even a House resolution briefly kicked around that Bush gets his mad money like a monthly stipend in which he had to show significant benchmarks, which is even more perfect for my analogy.

Overall, what Congress is going through with George Bush is getting to be exactly what Mrs. JP is currently going through with her parents, what so many middle-aged people go through when their parents get too incompetent to care for themselves or fall ill- the once-subordinate child, by necessity, becomes the parent.

Our kids never complained about having tokens doled out to them in dribs and drabs and my in-laws aren't complaining about being relieved of the burdens of home maintenance by their only child.

But Bush is complaining about being held to non-existent "rigid and artificial deadline(s) for American troops to begin withdrawing from Iraq". You know, like the one that said we'd be out of Iraq six to eight weeks, tops, after the 2003 invasion. Because Bush knows how incompetent his war's being run. He knows that the Iraqi parliament barely surpasses his own Congress in terms of skepticism and distrust.

Because he knows that benchmarks, even suggestions of them, will automatically set up for failure not the troops but him.

He's already failed and he knows it. He just can't and won't admit it. He'll try and keep his War Crimes going until a (hopefully) sane President pulls the plug on the Iraq clusterfuck and then blame him/her/?. That's his M.O.

Here's a great thought:

Any dog breeder will tell you that when two dogs copulate, the female determines the length of the time of procreation. The male's penis is, literally, caught by the female's vagina and he is not going to get out until she's damned good and ready.

Bush has really screwed the pooch on this one and the bitch isn't letting him go just yet.

A bucket of cold water is way too rude to use on dogs to break a tie, but I think it's entirely appropriate to use on Bush.

Thank you, Jurassicpork.

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