Friday, May 2, 2014

Cliven Bundy: Clown Car or Trojan Horse?

William Rivers Pitt is soooo good!

Fox News, and especially Sean Hannity, immediately began hyping the story all day and night, elevating Bundy to the status of instant Founding Father. How could they resist? Here was a guy who denies the existence of the US government while riding his horse on federal lands with an American flag strapped to his saddle. Cognitive dissonance is the meat and mead of Fox News, and the dissonance in that one image was weighty enough to bend the very light (my em).

It took about two weeks for everything to go sideways.

First, Mr. Bundy delivered his now-infamous rant about Black people being happier picking cotton as slaves, a statement he doubled down on later by comparing himself to Rosa Parks before saying that if Black people didn't like his opinions, it's because "Martin Luther King hasn't gotten his job done yet."

Skreeeeeeech went the needle off the record. Every right-wing media personality and politician who had rushed to publicly embrace Cliven Bundy immediately fled his presence as if he was covered in Goliath tarantulas. I think there still may be a Hannity-shaped hole in the studio wall at Fox News.

His ardent gun-toting supporters at the ranch stood their ground...until a few days ago, when there was a sudden falling-out between Bundy's own ranch security - commanded by a man actually named Booda Bear - and a contingent of Oath Keepers who had come to the ranch because Jesus, or something. Their leader, one Stewart Rhodes, informed Booda Bear (God, I could type his name all day) that he had "intel" from a "source of intelligence of high value" that Eric Holder and the Justice Department were going to deploy a "hot drone strike" against the Bundy Ranch within the next 24 hours. Because of this, the fearless leader was forced to re-deploy his stalwart troops off the ranch and into hotels with room service back in town.

This did not sit well with Booda Bear, who told Radio Free Redoubt's John Jacob Schmidt, "This is a battle front in some sense of the word and to remove them is kind of, ah, that's some yellow curd, ya know, spineless backbone piece of shit maneuvering right there. He had pretty much said, 'Well, I need to pull my guys back so they can allocate resources to the exterior of the area,' meaning go into the next town and get hotel rooms, get showers, gamble, eat steak dinners, while we're out here on the battle front...and just so everybody knows, as Booda, head of security for the Bundy family, I can swear on the white skin that covers my ass there will not be an Oath Keeper - there WILL NOT BE AN OATH KEEPER allowed to set foot on the internal ranch property."

And so not with a bang, but with a Derp, solidarity at the Bundy ranch "battle front" fell to dust that swirled and eddied around the white skin of Booda Bear's ass.
...

...and note you well: here in America, you can point a high-powered rifle at federal officers and get off scot-free with your gun still in your hand. Sit down at a peaceful Occupy protest on the campus of UC Davis in California, however, and you get a gushing face full of Mace for your trouble...while the cop who sprayed you gets $38,000 in compensation for "anxiety and depression."

Far more insidious is the fact that, until he pulled his little "What, Me Racist?" number for all the world to see, Mr. Bundy's most dedicated supporters were a couple of billionaire brothers named Charles and David Koch. The Koch Brothers, if truth be told, could not give less of a damn about Cliven Bundy and his band of merry men, but until Bundy blew out like an old, racist tire, they were intensely interested in using him as the avatar for a fight they've been waging for twenty years: placing control of publicly-owned federal lands back into the hands of the states, so the states can lease or sell those lands to companies like Koch Industries for cattle grazing, mining, drilling, fracking, and lumbering.

Right now, those lands are protected from such activities, but the Koch Brothers were hoping to ride Cliven Bundy's cause to a massive land grab. The fact that Cliven Bundy upended the intentions of the Koch Brothers by being a racist idiot on television does not change their intentions one whit. They want to drill, to mine, to frack, and to profit off those lands that belong to us, for now.

So, as matters currently stand, Cliven Bundy can certainly be quantified as a human clown car. Do not, however, lose sight of the real story here: Mr. Bundy was also a Trojan Horse filled with Koch Industries drilling equipment until he blew it. Bundy may be gone from the news soon, but the Koch Brothers still want that land, because the world is not enough for guys like that, which is why, to no small degree, the rest of us can't have nice things like clean air and water that doesn't catch on fire coming out of the tap.

The moral of the story is that, to the Kochs and their ilk, it's always about the Benjamins and these wannabe militia goons are useful idiots to their ends.

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

The NRA has declared war on America

Ana Marie Cox at The Guardian. links at site.

Wayne LaPierre and Co are not out merely to defend the Second Amendment or Newtown or gun laws anymore. They want you to pay the price for freedom and they want their money now

...NRA executive vice president Wayne LaPierre exhorted the crowd to a morally obligated vigilantism. He drew a vivid picture of a United States in utter decay and fragmented beyond repair, Mad Max-meets-Hunger Games, divided by Soylent Green:

We know, in the world that surrounds us, there are terrorists and home invaders and drug cartels and car-jackers and knock-out gamers and rapers, haters, campus killers, airport killers, shopping-mall killers, road-rage killers, and killers who scheme to destroy our country with massive storms of violence against our power grids, or vicious waves of chemicals or disease that could collapse the society that sustains us all.

LaPierre's bleak vision is exaggerated dystopianism in service of sedition, a wide-ranging survey of targets that put justice against the intrusions of the IRS on a continuum with (as an advertisement he ran during his speech put it) workplace "bullies and liars".
...


You cannot have it both ways. You cannot be both winning and losing, alone but united, the minority but the majority. It is almost (almost!) as if Wayne LaPierre intended to mislead his audience with this whiplash oratory, intended to dizzy them into acceptance of his underlying message, which is almost disappointingly mundane: give us money. Give the NRA money. Give us money so we can create the legal environment that allows gun manufacturers to make more money so that they can give us more money.

Conspicuously absent from LaPierre’s list of grievances was any serious consideration of the economic system that might have a role destabilizing the society for which he pantomimes such concern. [...]
...

The problem with the NRA lies with the people who lead it.

No shit. I joined the NRA when I was in the service, in the days when you had to be sponsored ny an NRA member to join. My company commander sponsored me. I like firearms and the shooting sports and I enjoyed their magazine and that was about it.

I dropped my membership like a hot rock when the NRA went right-wing in the late '70s. It wasn't all that political before that.

It's WAY worse than that now. Now it's part of the "domestic enemies" that I swore to defend the Constitution from in my Oath of Enlistment which I never un-took.

BTW, there was a shooting near a town in Georgia today where folks are required by law to keep a gun. Where were all the "good guys with guns" anyway? Another right-wing lie perhaps? Or are they just afraid to actually go in harm's way and maybe get their AR-15 giant penises blown off?

Headline of the Day

This just in. Choices have consequences and words are choices. This is just a bitch slap to a billionaire but I'm down wid it.

NBA Bans Donald Sterling For Life

Fixer has chimed in on this and says he's impressed with NBA commissioner Adam Silver. So am I. Neither of us are basketball fans but we're interested in speaking truth to power.

Monday, April 28, 2014

Oh. the irony

Ironic Times

VATICAN: TWO POPES CANONIZED
In historic “Buy One, Get One Free” ceremony.

Bill Introduced in Congress Would Create National Park on the Moon
Already, the wait for a decent campsite is 6 months.

Claiming an Error, Feds Rescind Approval of Powdered Alcohol Product “Palcohol
Seemed like a great idea, until they sobered up.
Those who'd rather mainline booze directly into their bloodstream are also in luck. Palcohol can be snorted!
What could possibly go wrong ... ?

Los Angeles Clippers Owner Caught Telling Girlfriend to Not Bring Blacks to Games
Clippers, with only J.J.Redick and Hedo Türkoglu available, lose to Golden State, 319-12.

Recent Book Proposes U.S., Canada Merge
We get oil, maple syrup, hockey players, they get Bible belt, high fructose corn syrup, baseball players.
War with Canada on the horizon...

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

WOO HOO!!!

This is so good I just swiped the whole thing!

Burning Man organizer plans anything-goes ‘Bundyfest’ to mock scofflaw rancher (via Raw Story )

Some of the organizers of the annual Burning Man festival are planning an event aimed at mocking the claims of a Nevada rancher who refuses to pay government-mandated fees for using federal lands. “For years, we paid permitting fees to hold Burning…

Monday, April 21, 2014

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

BERLUSCONI SENTENCED TO ONE YEAR COMMUNITY SERVICE WORKING WITH ELDERLY
Court rejects his request to work with troubled teens.
Heh. Will he get any bunga-bunga? Depends...

Fired Yahoo! Exec Receives $58 Million Severance Package After Just 15 Months on Job
“Yahoo!” he exclaims, and files for unemployment.

Only 1 in 6 Americans Can Find Ukraine on a Map
Only 1 in 600 Americans can find a map.

NCAA Approves Unlimited Food for Division I Athletes
If they sign an agreement before each meal not to unionize.

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Real, phony, mox nix. Fuck each other up toot de sweet. For the children...

The Difference Between Real And Phony GOP Civil Wars

Just a taste:

[...] But as we learned the last week, Paul is exposed as a heretic whenever his positioning takes him beyond standard GOP Obama-bashing into the past or future.

The 2009 video of Paul suggesting that the 2003 Iraq War was in no small part the product of Dick Cheney’s concerns for Halliburton profits didn’t just anger hard-core neoconservative defenders of the nobility of that war. It also carried him well beyond the pale of acceptable criticism of GOP foreign policy and of the two-term elected GOP Vice President of the United States.
...

In the end Paul may have made at least mild dissent from decades of Reaganite pro-military orthodoxy a bit more acceptable within the Republican Party. But anything more fundamental would indeed require a “civil war.”

Prediction: Not only will Ayn Rand Paul never be President, the next Repug President hasn't been born yet. Other than that, I hope all the different Repug factions stomp each other into mudholes and walk each other dry.

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

CORRECTION: Mrs. G informed me that we sat two rows behind Linda and Bernie Leadon at the Ash Grove when we went to see Country Gazette. If the memory ain't the first to go, I can't remember what is...

I have been a Linda Ronstadt fan since before I even heard of Emmylou. The closest I've been to her is the width of Santa Monica Blvd. in West Hollywood. I worked at the Standard Station across the street from The Troubadour where she played frequently in the late '60s. This is about Linda.

Published on Apr 11, 2014
A tribute to Linda Ronstadt. With Glenn Frey. Recorded in Brooklyn, NY on April 10, 2014

Thanks to Johnny Rotten.

Bonus Twofer:

Published on Apr 14, 2014
Inductor Glenn Frey of The Eagles and friend Emmylou Harris each talked about the talent, friendship, and health of Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame inductee Linda Ronstadt as she was tributed with an all-star singing cast of Harris, Stevie Nicks, Bonnie Raitt, Carrie Underwood, and Sheryl Crow.

Thanks to ArtisanNewsService.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Bundy is a lawbreaker, freeloader, and thief

There's been an awful lot of stuff on RWNJ rancher Bundy and his standoff with the feds out in East Cow Pie, Nevada.

States' rights activists flock to Nevada (video)

"Cliven Bundy is not a hero; he's not a victim. He's a guy who got away with breaking the law for 20 years." –Nevada political journalist Jon Ralston"
But ... IOKIYAR

Cliven Bundy Exposes the Cravenness of the Modern Right

Call it "individualism" or "libertarianism" or whatever you want, but those who declare themselves a Republic of One and raise their own flags are in a very literal sense being unpatriotic.

That's why I'm alarmed by the support in many conservative precincts for the Nevada scofflaws who have been exploiting public lands for private purposes and refuse to pay for the privilege because they choose not to "recognize" the authority of the United States. Totally aside from the double standards involved in expecting kid-glove treatment of one set of lawbreakers as opposed to poorer and perhaps darker criminal suspects, fans of the Bundys are encouraging those who claim a right to wage armed revolutionary war towards their obligations as Americans. It makes me really crazy when such people are described as "superpatriots." Nothing could be more contrary to the truth.

The details of the Bundy case have gotten a lot of attention at conservative sites, but the details really don't matter. Bundy has a baroque claim that the United States has no legal right to grazing land in Nevada; for over a decade, every court has summarily disagreed. It's federal land whether Bundy likes it or not, and Bundy has refused for years to pay standard grazing fees—so a couple of weeks ago the feds finally decided to enforce the latest court order allowing them to confiscate Bundy's cattle if he didn't leave. The rest is just fluff, a bunch of paranoid conspiracy theorizing that led to last week's armed standoff between federal agents and the vigilante army created by movement conservatives.
Read "Koch brothers' AFP".

The fact that so many on the right are valorizing Bundy—or, at minimum, tiptoeing around his obvious nutbaggery—is a testament to the enduring power of Waco and Ruby Ridge among conservatives. The rest of us may barely remember them, but they're totemic events on the right, fueling Glenn-Beckian fantasies of black helicopters and jackbooted federal thugs for more than two decades now. Mainstream conservatives have pandered to this stuff for years because it was convenient, and that's brought them to where they are today: too scared to stand up to the vigilantes they created and speak the simple truth. They complain endlessly about President Obama's "lawlessness," but this is lawlessness. It's appalling that so many of them aren't merely afraid to plainly say so, but actively seem to be egging it on.
I'm not going to rehash Ruby Ridge which was an FBI fuckup or Waco which didn't have to happen either.

Here's the deal - that land is our land which the feds administer for us and usually not very well, but Bundy is refusing to pay us for its use to his own profit. He's a lawbreaker, freeloader, and thief in the guise of a "patriot", in other words. an average wingnut teabagger.

Note to Bundy: Yo dude, ass, gas, or grass, nobody rides for free. Cough it the fuck up.

If it had been me in charge, I would have rounded up his cattle, sold them on the free market, and given him the change on his prison commissary account.

Further, I would have gone all Louis L'Amour on the fucking militia wannabes that gathered around him. Metaphorically speaking I'da flipped the loop off the hammer of my revolver and told 'em to open the ball. When the dust cleared, it would have been from them making tracks running away.

I know the feds don't want a shooting confrontation and that's why they returned his cows, but dammit, someone needs to take those fuckers on and settle it once and for all.

Monday, April 14, 2014

Oh, the irony...


Ironic Times

Rand Paul: GOP Can't Just Be “Party of Fat Cats, Rich Guys”
Shown: speaking before group of fat cats, rich guys.

Report: Hillary Clinton “Thinking” About Running for President
Also “thinking” about when to take next breath.
Heh.

By 2030, ¼ of U.S. Licensed Drivers Will Be Older Than 85
Blind as bats, mostly lost, mad as Hell.
You rang, bunkie?

Colorado's First Pot Vending Machine Operational
Not shown: line three miles long waiting to use it.

Monday, April 7, 2014

Oh. the irony...

Ironic Times

1/3 of Top 1,000 Donors to Campaigns in 2012 Worked in Finance, Real Estate, Insurance
All the rest in drug smuggling, arms trafficking, murder-for-hire.

Putin's Divorce Official
She gets Crimea.

Clapper Admits NSA Performed Warrantless Searches on Americans
Won't say any more until he's out of office and has a seven-figure book deal firmly in hand.

Goblet in Spanish Church is Holy Grail, Says New Book
With other Holy Grail claims across Europe, experts now believe Jesus gave them out as Last Supper souvenirs.
To go with the biggest PR stunt of all time - the "resurrection", wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Heh.

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

GOP INSIDERS LEANING TOWARD JEB BUSH IN 2016
But not sure he'll be willing to change his last name.
Wouldn't do any good. We know...

Two More Giant Pharaoh Statues Unveiled in Egypt
An expedition is immediately dispatched from London to steal them for the British Museum.

Spain Reaches Out to Jews, Expelled in 1492
They can return, no questions asked.

Vocabulary Builders
Oligarchy n., look around you.

Monday, March 31, 2014

GOP Strippers in Vegas

A "must read" by The Rude Pundit!

Whether its super-rich Jews in Vegas, super-rich Christians in Virginia Beach, or super-rich Muslims in Buffalo, there's just something crazy creepy about gatherings of religion-based political groups. Fuck, it's creepy that this is what politics has come to in the United States: pleasing the oligarchs. It's even creepier when the aforementioned Jews in Vegas, the Republican Jewish Coalition, met this past weekend because essentially the event was all just a chance for potential presidential candidates to do a shimmying striptease in front of gratuitously wealthy billionaire, Sheldon "Poster Child for Everything Wrong in America" Adelson.

Adelson is the owner of the Venetian Hotel and Casino, the Sands Convention Center, and loads of other shit. His money is made from gambling and the availability of legal whores, so, of course, he is the Uncle Sugar of the Republican Party. And he's a Jew. That's significant because he bankrolls the RJC and the RJC, while also concerned about general Republican nonsense (which mostly is "Fuck that Obama"), it is mega-concerned with Israel. The RJC has an Israel dildo so far up its ass that they yell, "Bibi!" when they ejaculate (my em). This means, of course, that if you're a Republican, you better say that you will stone cold murder anyone who throws the stink eye at Israel. You better shut that shit about giving rights to Palestinians. You better be willing to bomb the fuck out of Iran. Otherwise, if you just blow Israel's circumcised cock and neglect the balls, like Obama, you are not a "friend" to the Jewish state.

So it was at the RJC's Spring Leadership Meeting, and what a time it was. What with war criminal and former VP Dick Cheney defending the NSA at the Gala Dinner, a poker tournament where the buy-in was probably more than most of us make in a year, and a chance to watch madman John Bolton talk about what a pussy President Obama is, it was like a bar mitzvah on top of a Gaza missile strike of a party.
...

Then New Jersey's Chris Christie came out like a meth-craving slut at a South Amboy truck stop/all-nude club. He was down to a g-string about two minutes into his 40-minute speech, tossing out incomprehensible-but-tough-sounding bullshit like "I am not in this business to win the argument. I am in this business to win elections." Then he ripped off the g-string and bent over to present his puckered asshole to Adelson when he talked about meeting Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin "The Greatest, Braves Living Man Living" Netanyahu: "I was extraordinarily taken by his strength and resolve under circumstances that none of us can imagine." Except, oops, looks like while he was standing there, Christie ended up farting. He said, "I took a helicopter ride from the occupied territories," and those last two words are apparently the worst thing you can say ever because Christie had to let Adelson's personal assistant fuck his ass later while Adelson giggled and clapped and threw hundreds at them both.
Ever so much more! Read on!

Ukraine’s Inconvenient Neo-Nazis

When Ukrainian neo-Nazis – infuriated over the killing of an ultranationalist leader – surrounded the Parliament in Kiev, the incident presented a problem for the U.S. news media which has been trying to airbrush the neo-Nazis out of the Ukraine narrative, Robert Parry reports.

The U.S. media’s take on the Ukraine crisis is that a “democratic revolution” ousted President Viktor Yanukovych, followed by a “legitimate” change of government. So, to mention the key role played neo-Nazi militias in the putsch or to note that Yanukovych was democratically elected – and then illegally deposed – gets you dismissed as a “Russian propagandist.”

But Ukraine’s neo-Nazis are not some urban legend. Their presence is real, as they swagger in their paramilitary garb through the streets of Kiev, displaying Nazi insignias, honoring SS collaborators from World War II, and hoisting racist banners, including the white-power symbol of the Confederate battle flag.

Over the past few days, the neo-Nazis have surged to the front of Ukraine’s unrest again by furiously protesting the killing of one of their leaders, Oleksandr Muzychko, known as Sashko Bily. The Interior Ministry reported that Muzychko died in a Monday night shoot-out with police in Rivne in western Ukraine.

But the right-wing paramilitaries claim that Muzychko was murdered in a cold-blooded contract hit, and these modern-day storm troopers have threatened to storm the parliament building if the interim Interior Minister is not fired.
There is no such thing as "cold-blooded murder" of Nazis. They should be shot on sight, in my not so humble opinion.

This renewed disorder has complicated the storytelling of the major U.S. news media by challenging the sweetness-and-light narrative preferred by U.S. policymakers. The New York Times, the Washington Post and other leading news outlets have worked hard to airbrush the well-established fact that neo-Nazi militants spearheaded the coup on Feb. 22.

There's more, including Crimea voting itself Russian, but here's my bottom line:

If neo-Nazis take over Ukraine, we should HELP Putin take it back. We rid the world of that scourge once at great cost, and should stomp it out much more quickly when it raises its evil head or we didn't learn a damn thing from WWII.

Saturday, March 29, 2014

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

Published on Mar 26, 2014
[Stereo feed] Ms. Harris performs this song on late night USTV, and tells an interesting story of tracking down a steel guitar while on tour in Ireland, during the interview.
Funny interview!

Thanks to What's for afters?

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Man Gets Gerrymandered In Half

The Anti-News

"I love serving the people of my district", lied Mr. Gasbag, as he washed back his dolphin steak with a gulp of Jack & Pepsi. Texas District # 5 (Chauncy Gasbag's) stretches for almost two thousand miles as it weaves its way across the state, capturing within its boundaries only the sleaziest of shitbirds, fanatics, bigots and assholes. Starting in Dallas (at Cleb's Shoot & Drink Firing Range) District #5 extends west into Fort Worth, encompassing three fundamentalist mega churches, a whites only country club, and a bullet factory. The district then splits into three 'tentacles', each about a mile wide. One extends west towards Lubbock, where it includes an endangered species hunting ranch, and a cluster of ethnically cleansed counties. The second tentacle reaches east about two hundred miles (avoiding all the black people) to a training compound for angry white militias. The third tentacle sprawls south, where it includes all of Waco and Texas A & M fraternity row.

"We need to include every nutbag in the state", said gerrymandering expert Stanley Noneck, "so we've had to draw some pretty careful boundaries." In fact, District #5 spider webs its way down through Austin (where it's only one inch wide) and then fans out towards Houston, cherry-picking for fringe dwelling kooks for another six hundred miles. It sidesteps the house of State Senator Wendy Davis, skirts around the residence of progressive Ryan Linehan, zigs up supermarket aisles, zags down alleys, and dives beneath a Planned Parenthood clinic, before resurfacing near Odessa, TX and splitting the Parker family home clean in half.

The district boundary divides the king-size bed of Thelma and Braxton Parker. [...]

Heh. You KNOW you want to read the rest!

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

Leak at New Mexico Nuclear Waste Dump Causes Closure, Incoming Waste Being Stored in Parking Lot
Spokesman: “Not to worry, we've got nuclear waste stored in parking lots all over the country.”

In Beijing, Michelle Obama Calls Free Speech, Open Access toInformation “Universal Rights That Are the Birthright of Every Person on This Planet”
As reported by Tibetan News Service.

Your iPhone Can Now Wake You Up to the Smell of Bacon
Available soon in coffee, roses, parmesan cheese.

Robot Solves Rubik's Cube in 3.25 Seconds, Faster Than Any Human
Fastest human, after witnessing feat, smashes robot into million pieces in just 1.03 seconds.

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

Hardly strictly Emmylou but I think you'll like it.

Written by Patty Griffin. Harmony vocals by Emmylou Harris.
Accompanied by Buddy Miller and ... ? Lyrics at YouTube.

Thanks to pennstatefan1.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

A Secession Plan That Works

Joel Stein in Time magazine. Because you may not be able to access it behind their paywall, here it is in toto.

Why should Ukraine be the only country that’s ripe for splitting in two?

The reason there’s so much dysfunction and gridlock in Washington, I tell people, is honesty. It’s not like the two halves of our country ever got along great, but for a while we had an uneasy compromise, because Southerners refused to join the party of Lincoln. So red Democrats muted blue ones, and rich Northerners, who had no reason to join this weird compromise, became liberal Republicans, muting the red ones. So for 200 years, politicians from the two halves were able to make compromises that were good for everyone except black people. Then, like some great national therapist, Ronald Reagan turned the South Republican by encouraging it to express how it really felt, which ruined everything. Now we fight all the time, and it’s not good for the kids. Half our country watches Fox News, the other half watches MSNBC, and both watch Duck Dynasty but for very different reasons.

We should peacefully break into two countries, one made of red states and one of blue. The red one would still be called the United States of America, since it would otherwise have to alter the lyrics of every song its citizens know. The blue one would be renamed something racially inclusive and exceedingly long and hard to remember. The Exceedingly Long-Named Country would be free to have the laws it has always griped about not being able to pass. Instead of guns, cops would carry Change.org petitions. Strip malls would be full of Planned Parenthood clinics. Recreational drugs would be sold at convenience stores instead of in convenience-store parking lots. It would be a Scandinavia-like country where very few people worked, income was redistributed through taxes and all the citizens lied to one another about which movies they saw.

Once the blue states were their own country, they would develop a greater appreciation for the South, as a foreign country they could visit when Mexico seemed like too much effort and Canada too little. A land filled with charming storytellers so friendly they say “Hi” even though they don’t know you. A place with the best breakfasts in the entire world. Where it’s easy to navigate since everyone speaks English, but figuring stuff out is still a bit of a fun challenge because, after all, it’s not really English. A place where you can shoot guns, drive cars with combustion engines and drink beer that isn’t painfully bitter–all at the same time. Best of all, the vacation would be really cheap. Imagine the fun of paying for your bed-and-breakfast with colorful Southern money. “Two Dolly Partons and one Merle Haggard? That’s like half a Samuel Gompers!” And just like when Northerners visit any other foreign country, if they get sick on vacation, they’ll want to come back home since the hospitals down there definitely won’t take their health care coverage. This split would in no way prevent Southerners from vacationing up North for the same reasons they always have: they have relatives there and have no choice.

The South would serve as a buffer between the North and Mexico, allowing Northerners to pass all the immigration laws they want without actually having any immigrants. They could make environmental treaties with foreign nations about how to extract natural resources, since they’ll have no natural resources anyway. The South, meanwhile, could pass laws every month not to raise its debt ceiling since, let’s face it, no one is going to lend a Southerner money.

One reason people are reluctant to do this, I know, is that they feel it would waste all the hard work done by Abraham Lincoln. Not at all. The Civil War provided vital benefits, such as ending slavery, turning us into a superpower and keeping our dads busy with piles of nonfiction books. But since the Cold War ended, we haven’t had any decent competition and we’ve been slacking. Splitting the U.S. in two will spur us on. We’ll have the two biggest militaries, the two biggest economies and, it’s safe to assume, the two gaudiest flags. Israel will be thrilled to double its number of allies. The Super Bowl will be way more exciting when instead of the AFC playing the NFC, the USA will face off against the Exceedingly Long-Named Country. The Miss America Pageant, however, will be exactly the same, other than having only 25 contestants.

While we work out all the paperwork to separate into two countries, we’ll have to go back to getting along and agreeing to compromise. Because if we keep up with the gridlock in D.C. and the vitriol in our conversations, our breakup is going to be far too acrimonious to allow President Jan Brewer and President Jon Stewart to get along.

Monday, March 17, 2014

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

CRIMEANS VOTE TO JOIN RUSSIA, SECEDE
Reject alternative (Secede, Join Russia).

World on Brink of Another Cold War
Three new Bond films greenlighted.

Analysis: GOP Split by Generational Divide
Old guard opposes same-sex marriage, abortion, legalizing marijuana, immigration reform, affirmative action, food stamps, Medicare, Medicaid, social security, taxes and any programs to help the poor; young guard disagrees with them on pot.

California Gov. Brown Unsure About Pot Legalization, Asks, “How Many People Can Get Stoned and Still Have a Great State?”
Then answers his own question: “Wow, man, that is such a total mind bender...”

REMINDER
Ask your pot dispensary if they accept bitcoins.

The Answer Is Turnout: Vote, You Jackass

It's not too early to be thinking about this.

William Rivers Pitt

Bill Clinton, in his first inauguration speech, said, "There is nothing wrong with America that cannot be fixed by what is right with America." One of the things that is right with America is your right to vote, and when I hear people say voting does not matter, does not make a difference, it makes me want to tear my teeth out.

Math: the coocoobirds who think dinosaurs don't exist because they aren't mentioned in the Bible comprise, give or take, about 12% of the voting population in America. They are a small minority within a minority party. When only 50% of the voting population shows up to vote in a presidential election year, that 12% doubles to 25%, because those 12%-ers go to the polls even if it is raining live jaguars outside...which means any right-wing candidate who says the right things about Jesus, fetuses and guns is halfway to the 50.1% needed for victory before they put their pants on come election day. To call that an enormous advantage is to devalue the definition of "enormous."

...and in midterm elections - the ones that decide the entire House and a third of the Senate - turnout tends to sit somewhere around 35%, which means that 12% dead-bang guaranteed turnout actually flexes to about 40%. Which explains the current House of Representatives pretty succinctly.

So don't don't don't don't just don't you dare tell me that voting doesn't matter. That is a heaping crock of lazy crap. In point of fact, the decline this nation has endured over the last fifty years, the empowerment of the moneyed few over the many, and the rise in power of Taliban Christianity, exactly and precisely matches the dwindling turnout numbers on election day...which, by the bye, has a direct relationship to the "lesser of two evils" candidates you holier-than-thous refuse to turn out for. If you don't like your choices, it's because you didn't make a choice in the last election, and the one before, and the one before. Nature, and politics, abhor a vacuum. If you don't like what has filled it, non-voter, find a mirror and stare into the eyes of the reason why.

If you don't vote, you are responsible for this. If you vote, you can fix this. I have a fever-dream involving 80-90% turnout across the board in two consecutive elections, midterm and then general. Such a one-two punch event would change the country overnight, and these candidates you can't stomach would scurry back to the dark corners they came from. That kind of turnout would obliterate the power of money in politics in one fell swoop.

Shorter: The well-funded nutzoid right-wing voters make it a point to turn out to vote en masse for their sorry ideological shit and that's why we're fucked. WE OUTNUMBER THEM only if we show up and we had better.

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

Click the YouTube icon in the lower right and read a lengthy and interesting piece on Irish music.

Published on Mar 11, 2014
Click "Show more" below for ++ eolas / info ! Bringing it all back home (to Ireland),Irish USA music,Philip King

Thanks to TG Amhrán.

Monday, March 10, 2014

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

U.S. INTELLIGENCE FAILED TO PREDICT RUSSIAN MILITARY INVERVENTION IN CRIMEA
But did predict your patio makeover after you discussed it on the phone with Aunt Millie.
Priorities...

Washington, D.C. Decriminalizes Marijuana
It's now as legal for an adult to buy a joint as it is for a tobacco lobbyist to buy a congressman.

Radio Shack to Close 1100 Stores
Blames reduced demand for replacement vacuum tubes for Victrolas.

Report: Climate Change May Cause “Cascading System Failures”
First the ice caps will melt, then the coasts will flood, then the power grid will go out, then the cable will go out — and that's when it get serious.

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Friday, March 7, 2014

Why We Did It - the unrated version

I'm sure a lot of us watched Rachel Maddow's report on why Cheney and Bush lied us into their criminal war in Iraq. We knew why 10 years ago. The report did flesh out some of the details and was well done but nothing earth-shatteringly new.

Daily Kos brought up some stuff I for one had not thought about. Worth a read.

MSNBC's short documentary titled “Why We Did It” that aired March 06th, 2014 was somewhat informative but mostly anticlimactic. The only people in this country who have never believed that these actions were about oil are either disingenuous for political reasons, or stupid.

A few simple facts:
a) Saddam Hussein was planning to switch to the Euro as his reserved currency, which would have had drastic effects on the value of the Dollar and the U.S. Economy. This is widely considered to be the prime motive for taking him out.

b) The spot price of oil bottomed out in 2002 at around $20.00 a barrel. By July 3rd, 2008, the spot price of oil had reached a peak of $145.31 a barrel. This upward trend tracks the progress of the war with an interesting parallel between a drop in Iraqi casualties in Jan 2008, the beginning of the Great Recession, and the sharp reduction in the price of oil after July 2008.

c)There is a bubble of record high profits by oil companies between late 2003 and 2008. Record oil profits track the war, not the peace.

They knew we had shale oil and that the infrastructure to extract shale oil was practically a pipe dream with oil prices at $20.00 a barrel. Meaning that the wars were not just a device for maximizing oil profits and the profits of oil tech companies like Halliburton but also a means to get the extraction infrastructure in place in the U.S. before demand from the new emerging BRIC countries would take hold.

The war wasn't to secure oil. it was about making the price of oil increase, both for sheer profit and to make fracking financially viable to make even more profit.

It's always about the Benjamins, dame Bush and Cheney's eyes.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Headline of the Day

Vladimir Putin is Every Republican Bigot’s Wet Dream
Uh ... yup ...

First Pro-Marijuana Commercial Debuts on Major Network

I'm kind of kidding Fixer with this since he likes sushi aka "bait". :-)

Published on Feb 26, 2014
First Marijuana Commercial Debuts on Major Network produced by MarijuanaDoctors.com, the only service that connects patients with physicians for medical marijuana recommendations.

Visit www.MarijuanaDoctors.com to book your appointment or call 1-866-996-9333

Thanks to MarijuanaDoctors.com.

Monday, March 3, 2014

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

From the "Latest Headlines" crawl:

Russian Olympic biathlon team seizes control of Crimes
...

'12 Years A Slaveowner' wins Hoodie at KKK Awards
...

Senate cafeteria replaces Russian dressing with Thousand Island dressing

UKRAINE CRISIS THREATENS NEW COLD WAR
Hegel orders all nuclear forces to immediately stop taking drugs and try to pass their proficiency exams without cheating.

Arizona Governor Vetoes Bill Allowing Businesses to Refuse Service to Gays
Says God told her to do it, “or lose the Super Bowl.”

Swiss Bank Helped Rich Evade Taxes
Also, this winter in Switzerland, it snowed.

Ukraine: Abandoned Yanukovych Estate Opened to Public
Used same decorator as Saddam, Qaddafi.

Ukrainegate

El Rude-o. Links at site.

Look to Bush and Iraq, Not Obama and Syria, If You Think the U.S. Has Lost Influence in the World

One consistent theme throughout the coverage of Ukrainegate (why not?) is that President Barack Obama is a big, wet pussy getting roughly fucked by the manly man Vladimir Putin. Obama drew a red line over Syria that he had to back down from, they say, because Putin stepped in to help get rid of Syria's chemical weapons, so Russia felt free to ignore Obama's red line on the Ukraine last week. Obama is naive or inexperienced or dumb or incompetent or some combination of those, others bitch. "Weak" and "indecisive," as Senator Lindsey Graham said, essentially repeating what he tells the young South Carolina twinks he picks up who are unsure if they wanna fuck an old man's ass.

There's one thing the Rude Pundit knows for sure about President Obama. He never came out of a meeting with Vladimir Putin and said, "I looked the man in the eye. I found him to be very straight forward and trustworthy and we had a very good dialogue. I was able to get a sense of his soul." That is what the last president of the United States, one George W. Bush, said in June 2001 at a press conference with the ex-KGB spy standing next to him. Democrats criticized Bush at the time (as did some conservatives), but they didn't go bugnuts condemning him as a throbbing vagina. They just thought it was weird. And anyone could see that Putin was conning the rube. As Joe Biden said then, "I don't trust Putin; hopefully the president was being stylistic rather than substantive." But what does Biden know?

The other thing that the Rude Pundit knows is that President Bush started a war in Iraq by lying not just to the American people, but to the leaders of nations around the world about weapons of mass destruction. Remember the "Coalition of the Willing," the countries that were led by credulous fools or easily cowed wimps or the bribe-able who agreed to help in some way with the completely worthless attack on a sovereign nation? This ain't "Blame Bush" only. It's geopolitical history, motherfuckers. The shame of it all is that the people who helped engineer our slow demise in world influence, like Graham and John McCain, are still allowed to act as if they know what's best for the nation.
...

Whatever happens in the Ukraine will be dictated primarily by how much of a power play Putin is after (or, you know, so the Rude Pundit thinks after his one-hour of research). Obama's limited in how he can respond, not only because we're not fuckin' going to war with Russia, but because the rest of the goddamn planet thinks we're a bunch of assholes who need to pay a goddamn price for dicking everyone over.

Everyone loves to see the giant squirm when he's been a global dick.

Saturday, March 1, 2014

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

Published on Feb 27, 2014
Going through my old LP collection and converting them to digital format. Lots of old gems have popped up, including this one. Such a melancholy song, made even more so by Emmylou's plaintive voice. What a treasure Emmylou has been, huh? I've been listening to her for over 40 years now. Can't say that about very many artists.

From the album "Cimarron", which I consider to be one of her best, if not *the* best. Written by Clinton Codack and Wendy Special.

I agree.

Thanks to Bob Marshall.

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Quote of the Day

From "Bobby Jindal Gives Up, Joins the 'Stupid Party'":

Which is to say, if “Jindal 2016” were a race horse, I wouldn’t just hedge my bets—I’d buy shares in the glue factory.

Jindal's presidential aspirations died with his Howdy Doody/Kenneth the Page GOP response to the SOTU speech years ago. He's the only one who doesn't know it.

Update: Bonus QotD

From "Bobby Jindal: The Motherfucker at Work" by The Rude Guess Whom:

And then Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal, likely loser in the 2016 presidential race, walked up to the mike and decided, quite vividly, "Fuck this shit. I got some primaries to win."
Fearless prediction: He won't win even one. He will likely not even make a serious run at it if anyone has the balls to tell him he's darker "colored" than Obama and the south has had enough of that uppity shit!

Tinfoil Hat Brigade To March On D.C.

"1.8 Million Definite Militia Members" to March on DC, Install New Government

Harry Riley has a dream. On the morning of May 16, somewhere between 10 and 30 million (estimates vary) God-fearing patriots will assemble in Washington, DC, for what Riley, a retired Army colonel from the Florida panhandle, is calling "Operation American Spring." They’ll protest outside the White House by day and set up in campgrounds and RV parks outside the city by night. They won't leave until President Barack Obama, along with Attorney General Eric Holder and congressional leaders of both parties, resign and appear before a specially convened investigative tribunal for further disciplinary action—a polite version of a tea party coup. It's not likely to happen—but two former Fox News personalities have endorsed the endeavor.

"We have 1.8 million definite militia members coming," promises Operation American Spring spokeswoman Karen Smith. (The Anti-Defamation League pegs the number of American militia members at about 20,000.) "Other than that, we're not keeping a list of concerned people or whatever because how are we gonna do that?"

According to Riley's introductory note, which he posted on Facebook, about 1 million activists will stick around DC after the march in a nonviolent attempt to shut the city down. According to the the document, the real work will occur after the transfer of power: "Those with the principles of a West, Cruz, Lee, DeMint, Paul, Gov Walker, Sessions, Gowdy, Jordan, Issa, will comprise a tribunal and assume positions of authority to convene investigations (my em), recommend appropriate charges against politicians and government employees to the new U.S. Attorney General appointed by the new President."
...

For Riley & Co., the stakes couldn't be higher. "My knees will not touch the surface as a result of some piss ant occupant of the White House or a corrupt legislator, or outside element," Riley wrote. "I will fall to my death standing if necessary."
Says the outside element. I wish him well falling to his death. More.

Mark your calendars. I do not recommend laying in extra popcorn. It'll go stale while you're waiting for something to happen. Heh.

Monday, February 24, 2014

Oh, the irony...


Ironic Times

U.S. Reassures Persian Gulf Allies
Reminds them of our consistent support of repressive monarchies.

Analysis: Ukraine Ideologically Split Down Middle
Half capitalist lapdogs, half Soviet apologists.

Arizona Passes Bill Allowing Businesses to Refuse Service to Gays
Rejects more moderate measure allowing shoddy service.

New Georgia License Plate
Features Confederate Flag

For drivers who prefer not to be
pulled over by police.

They love being losers.

Saturday, February 22, 2014

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

Uploaded on Jan 21, 2012
Emmylou Harris, an American singer-songwriter and musician sings 'To Daddy' to Johnny Hallyday, France's favourite rocker, in Nashville in 1984.

Thanks to iMariola.

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

An Open Letter to Ben Gozzi

Political Garbage Chute


Go Get Your Big, Red Rubber Shoes, Bozo

You’re a failure, Mr. Issa. If your job is to find out what’s broken or wasteful in our government so that we can fix it, you have failed in truly comical proportions. Which brings me to why I write this letter. You see, I think I have a proposal for you that is mutually beneficially for all of us — we the American people and you, the American dumb ass. Apparently there’s a growing need within this country — a labor pool that is shrinking and I think you’re the man to fill it.

There’s a real, honest-to-God clown shortage in America, Rep. Issa, and who better to lead the clowning community in this country to a new day than the GOP’s clown prince himself? You’ve pretty much been spending the last five years honing your comedic timing and inane banter, both things that clowns really excel at. And when it comes to big, flashy gags that are meant to keep the masses entertained but that always wind up blowing up in your face, no one can top you spectacular crashes. You’ve all but perfected the Congressional Pratfall. That’s where you puff up your chest, say some really incendiary things, and then have them all blow back in your face when pesky things like “facts” or “truth” trip you up.
...

You’ve been the GOP’s chief bozo since taking over the oversight committee and promising to expose the Obama administration as the “most corrupt administration” — your words, not mine — in history. You’ve packed your hearing rooms with fellow clowns Louie Gohmert of Texas, Mike Rodgers of Alabama, and Trent Franks of Arizona. I even have your clown name picked out, Darrell — Ben Gozzi the Clown. Bozo was already taken, or you’d have just been handed that one. But I think Ben Gozzi suits you best.
Much more.

Issa wasn't a very good car thief or arsonist and he's a terrible congressman and an embarrassment to us reality-based Californios.

Vultures And Vote Rustlers

Truthout Interviews Greg Palast on the Koch Brothers and Chris Christie

Investigative reporter and Truthout contributor, Greg Palast, has spent most of his career exposing the corrupting effects of money and politics in many hard-hitting pieces. Greg is gifted in his ability to connect the dots between billionaires and politicians by following the money. In the Citizens United era, it can be more difficult to follow the money because of the anonymity 501(c)(4) Super PACs afford their donors. But that hasn't stopped Greg, who shares with me some of what he has uncovered in his Truthout article, "Christie and Koch in Cahoots? It's Time to Subpoena the Committee for Our Children's Future."

A little long, but gives a good insight on where democracy went.

Thanks to Ted Asregadoo.

Also see:

How Dark Money Flows Through the Koch Network

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

U.S. Finishes Ahead of Haiti, 133 Other Countries in Annual Press Freedom Index
Only Finland, Netherlands, Norway, Luxembourg, Andorra, Liechtenstein, Denmark, Iceland, New Zealand, Sweden, Estonia, Austria, Czech Republic, Germany, Switzerland, Ireland, Jamaica, Canada, Poland, Slovakia, Costa Rica, Namibia, Belgium, Cape Verde, Cyprus, Uruguay, Ghana, Australia, Belize, Portugal, Suriname, Lithuania, United Kingdom, Slovenia, Spain, Antigua and Barbuda, Latvia, El Salvador, France, Samoa, Botswana, South Africa, Trinidad and Tobago, Papua New Guinea and Romania finished ahead of us.

Sochi: Putin Refuses to Turn Down Olympic Flame
Giant torch being blamed for record temperatures, slushy snow, soft ice, lackluster performances.

Billionaire Tom Perkins: Rich Should Be Given More Votes
Instead of having to spend their own money to buy them.

1 in 4 Americans Doesn't Know Earth Circles Sun
1 in 6 thinks babies delivered by storks.

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Monday, February 10, 2014

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

PUTIN WELCOMES WORLD TO SOCHI OLYMPICS
Says security not a problem.

In Future War, Justice Scalia Doesn't Rule Out Internment Camps
For people who look like liberals, say.
Heh. Fat Tony's one administration late. It's the RWNJs that are worried during this one.

NASA: Kepler-413b Binary System Has Planet Where Seasons Change Almost Daily
Scientists hope to simulate planet's conditions by spending two weeks in Chicago.

Spreadsheet Listing 40 Top Koch Donors Mistakenly Left Behind by Guest at Seminar
In brief: don't eat Papa John pizza or buy Jockey underwear.

Saturday, February 8, 2014

Headline Il Due and Question of the Day

R.I.P. Republican credibility: Why their latest blatant lies show they’ve given up

Why don't they just STFU and die already?

Headline and Sub Head of the Day

Because too much to quote.

No, Liberals Don't Control the Democratic Party

The left may have more clout than it once did, but commentators shouldn't mistake progressives for the Democrats' equivalent of the Tea Party.

Personally, I'm more anti-right-wing than liberal. If we get rid of the fringe right we'll be OK.

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

I love this version.

Published on Mar 9, 2013
From Emmylou Harris and Willie Nelson comes this sensitive, beautiful song "Gulf Coast Highway" written by Nanci Griffith, Danny Flowers, and James Hooker. It appeared on Emmylou's Duets album released by Reprise on July 24, 1990 and available on CD.

Thanks to catman916.

Thursday, February 6, 2014

"Lawless!"

Don't hold back, Old Fart! Come outta yer shell and say what you really mean. Heh.

Thanks to oldfartrants.

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

OLYMPICS: SECURITY TIGHT AS GAMES BEGIN
Biathlon competitors told to fire at anyone acting suspiciously.

More Reports of Cheating, Drugs Among Nuclear Missile Corps
Experts: we're one bad acid trip away from Dr. Strangelove.

New Hampshire Poll: Romney Republican Frontrunner
Edges out John McCain, Bob Dole.
Probably shoulda warned ya about that one. My bad. Heh.

Hundreds Sickened on Cruise Ship
CDC still trying to identify source of illness on Royal Caribbean's Salmonella Islands Tour.

Saturday, February 1, 2014

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

From Later With Jools Holland, 1995

Published on Jan 27, 2014
BBC2, London, 26 November 1995.
RTP2 - Portuguese Public Televison, Lisbon.
Subtitled for your convenience.

Thanks to Jose Neves.

Friday, January 31, 2014

"Take Orders And Eat Crap"

Christian conservatives constantly skew facts to conform to their ideologies. And they get away with it because the people who listen to them are sheep who never learned skills in critical thinking. They just believe what they're told in their churches and on Fox News.
...

So where are all the verses where Jesus endorses the bullshit conservatives are trying to sell today?
They're in the Bible they haven't read.

Thanks to oldfartrants.

Thursday, January 30, 2014

Quote of the Day

From "The Republican Conspiracy Has Worked":

A flurry of executive orders is obviously better than nothing, but it’s hardly the kind of bold change this country needs to undo the destruction caused by thirty-three years of Reaganomics.

No, it's not. Please read the rest.

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

The myth of the Christian conservative

If it's Wednesday it must be Morford going on about phony christians.



I often wonder, given sufficient whisky and irony and time: Has there ever been a more delightfully inept, wince-inducing oxymoron in the tortured American lexicon than “conservative Christian?”
Speaking of the DeVos clan:

From Reagan to Bush 41, Bush 43 to Mitt, union-busting to anti-choicism, antediluvian “family values” advocacy to pro-corporate think tanks, Blackwater to the unutterably silly Left Behind books, this is the kind of power-hungry billionaire clan that has its tentacles in every right-wing movement, cause and devious conservative ploy since the early ‘60s.
...

Ah, Christians. Always the last to understand irony.

I ponder: What must that be like? To believe you are something that you so very much are not? To hold a set of values that, in truth, have nothing whatsoever to do with the real source that supposedly inspires and defines it?

It’s a severe, almost laughable chasm between what Republicans define as “Christian conservative” values – isolationism, protectionism, love of fireams, suppression of alternative viewpoints, sexual dread, belief in strict gender roles and family structures, institution-as-guardian, and so on – and the teachings of the actual, messy historical Jesus who taught, well, the exact opposite.

Reading this piece, it struck me again, for the 1,000th time: As far as we can tell and if he actually existed, Jesus was a shaman. A seer. A radical. A wild and divinely possessed trickster and spiritual pathfinder. What’s more, it’s possible that he was frequently stoned. Hallucinating. Hey, lots of them were. Wouldn’t you be? Psychoactive plants have been used to commune with sacred realms since cavemen scribbled trippy hieroglyphs on the wall by moonlight. It’s just what gurus, mystics and saviors do.
Yes, yes we do. Heh.

So now it begins to make more sense. While conservative Christians of the DeVos variety aggressively despise everything the real Jesus stood for – nonviolence, aiding the poor, ministering to the sick, equal rights, spiritual autonomy, the anointing of lots of trippy holy oil to commune with sacred realms – they very much value what came next: the institutionalized church and all its megalomaniacal, sociopolitical success, perhaps the greatest, most oppressive corporation/political operation of all time. The GOP can only dream.
Well said, young Mark, but you left out "medieval criminal consortium".

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

El Rude-o on the SOTU

If You're Not Blaming the GOP for the Crappy State of the Union, You're Lying:
...

We never got to see what an Obama presidency would be like because Republicans decided that there wouldn't be an Obama presidency.

One great experiment of the Obama administration, so far, was to attempt to reel the imperial presidency back in (yeah, we're leaving surveillance off the table here). It was to try to get Congress to do its fucking job. But Republicans changed the rules of the game on Obama. If they had been playing baseball, they'd have said, "Okay, we demand four outs, five strikes, and no foul balls, just for us." And Obama would have said, "Sure. Now can we play?" And they would have said, "And you have to play without shoes and gloves." And Obama would have said, "Sure. Can we start the game?" And they would have said, "And each of us gets to fuck your wife in the ass on the pitcher's mound while you watch." And when Obama said, "No, that's bullshit," they'd've said, "Why don't you want to play baseball?"

The shame is that Obama didn't say, early in his first term, "Fuck off. I'm heading to the batting cages." Now that he's announced he's finally going to use executive authority more broadly, and he's used it less than any president in the last century, the GOP is whining that Obama is doing something unconstitutional. These would be the same Republicans who lapped up President Bush's executive orders and signing statements like jizz-gobblers at a jack-off-a-thon.

Everyone is offering their useless suggestions for "What the President Should Say Tonight." So let the Rude Pundit play Fantasy SOTU. What Obama oughta say to the United States is "Vote these Republican motherfuckers out of here. They have hurt the nation and will continue to do so. You know the deal. You reelected me to get shit done. That ain't gonna happen until these assholes who keep hurting the poor and hungry are fuckin' gone. It's up to you, America. 2014 could be the year you make this a sane country again. You gotta put a hurt on the GOP. Let's hurt them until Ted Cruz is begging to kiss my black ass."

Fuckin' A.

Headline of the Day


So long, Pete. You made a difference.

Monday, January 27, 2014

Stop Beating A Dead FOX

Daddy Frank's latest feature.

The conservative news channel’s only real power is in riling up liberals, who by this point should know better.

The most interesting news about Fox News is that for some years now it has been damaging the right far more than the left. As a pair of political analysts wrote at Reuters last year, “When the mainstream media reigned supreme, between 1952 and 1988, Republicans won seven out of the ten presidential elections,” but since 1992, when “conservative media began to flourish” (first with Rush Limbaugh’s ascendancy, then with Fox), Democrats have won the popular vote five out of six times. You’d think they’d be well advised to leave Fox News to its own devices so that it can continue to shoot its own party in the foot.
...

[...] With a median viewer age now at 68 according to Nielsen data through mid-January (compared with 60 for MSNBC and CNN, and 62 to 64 for the broadcast networks), Fox is in essence a retirement community.

The million or so viewers who remain fiercely loyal to the network are not, for the most part, and as some liberals still imagine, naïve swing voters who stumble onto Fox News under the delusion it’s a bona fide news channel and then are brainwashed by Ailes’s talking points into becoming climate-change deniers. They arrive at the channel as proud, self-selected citizens of Fox Nation and are unlikely to defect from the channel or its politics until death do them part. (As Sherman writes, “Ailes’s audience seldom watches anything” on television but Fox News.) Hard as it may be to fathom, Fox Nation is even more monochromatically white than the GOP is, let alone the American nation. Two percent of Mitt Romney’s voters were black. According to new Nielsen data, only 1.1 percent of Fox News’s prime-time viewership is (as opposed to 25 percent for MSNBC, 14 percent for CNN, and an average of roughly 12 percent for the three broadcast networks’ evening news programs).

The Fox News membership is more than happy to be cocooned in an echo chamber where its own hopes and fears will be reinforced by other old white “people like us.” [...]

I'm 68 and white and I don't watch FOXNoise. I see enough clips from it on the channels I do watch that I don't have to. Heh.

Rather than waste time bemoaning Fox’s bogus journalism, liberals should encourage it. The more that Fox News viewers are duped into believing that the misinformation they are fed by Ailes is fair and balanced, the more easily they can be ambushed by reality as they were on Election Night 2012.

My sentiments exactly. As we used to say (probably still do) in the Corps, "Ambush is murder and murder is fun."

Fox News’s theoretical political power is further compromised by the internal crisis it shares with the GOP: its inability to navigate the conflict between the party Establishment and the radical base that is dividing the conservative ranks. The network has veered all over the place to try to placate both camps, only to end up wounded in the crossfire.

Perfect! When your enemies are shooting at each other and catching their propagandista in the middle and you don't have to do a thing, it's a "couch and popcorn" ambush. The best kind! More butter, please!

Paradoxically enough, the most powerful right-wing movement in the country, the insurgency in the Republican grassroots, loathes the Boehner-Christie-Rove-centric Fox News nearly as much as the left does.

Also paradoxically, this disproves the old adage that "the enemy of my enemy is my friend".

Please go read this.

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

Pentagon Considers Replacing Thousands of Troops With Robots
Soldiers would be retrained as lobbyists.

Study: Chinese Factories Cause Nearly 25% of California's Pollution
And almost a quarter of its gorgeous sunsets.

JP Morgan's Dimon Receives 74% Raise to $20 Million a Year
Bank's board of directors rewards him for keeping them out of jail.

NFL May Drop Extra Point, Allow Pot to Treat Concussions
According to new league rules voted on by fans.

Monday, January 20, 2014

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

Scientists See East Coast at Risk as Seas Rise
However, if you live on the fourth floor or higher, you should be good until 2114.

Surgeon General Report: Cigarettes More Dangerous Than Previously Thought
Urges smokers switch to marijuana immediately.
Yes, the Prison Industrial Complex needs you healthy to cut down on healthcare cost while you're incarcerated for smoking marijuana.

Amazon Patents “Anticipatory Shipping” That Will Ship Items Before They've Been Ordered
Patent pending on “anticipatory billing” that bills you for something you didn't order, don't want and can't return.
Why do I have no trouble believing this?

Report: Smart Appliances Hacked to Send Computer Viruses
Warning: don't answer any emails from your toaster.


Friday, January 17, 2014

Note to Conservatives and the Media:

Most of Us Still Don't Give a Shit About Benghazi:

El Rude-o, links at site.

Dear, sweet Republicans and Fox "news," truly, really, speaking for the vast majority of the nation that doesn't watch Bill O'Reilly after dinner or listen to Rush Limbaugh while driving or have Glenn Beck on in the background while boning a blow-up doll, we don't give a happy monkey fuck about Benghazi. Beyond "Man, that was a bad thing that happened. Let's try to stop it from happening again," there is nothing there. No cover-up. No one had any heads up. There were a few tragic errors in judgment on security that, had they not been made, might have prevented shit from going south. That's it. If you read the actual Senate intelligence Committee report, what comes through is the dude who fucked up a great deal on boosting security was Ambassador Chris Stevens, who died in the attack on the consulate. He was asked repeatedly if he needed more military in Benghazi, and he declined. Sorry if that fucks up the fun narrative, but truth will do that every time.

Desperately trying to damage Hillary Clinton pre-2016, especially now that Macy's balloon Chris Christie has been punctured, conservatives are out in force, trying to pin the blame for the attack on Clinton, even though the report does nothing of the sort. Besides the completely nonsensical comparison between Christie's bridge problem and Benghazi, we have every other Republican with presidential ambitions jumping in to try to show their conspiracy-theory cred to the nutzoids in the base. Rubio promised more hearings. The always-high Rand Paul slurred something incomprehensible. Ted Cruz said obvious Ted Cruz-like shit.

Look, unless you've got evidence of a deliberate cover-up, unless you've got video of Hillary Clinton personally slitting Stevens' throat while Barack Obama fucks his ass as al-Qaeda militants ululate and fire their rifles into the air in praise, the vast majority of us in the United States, the ones who aren't the delusional GOP primary voters, simply don't care.

But, hell, that never stopped the GOP before.

Normally I'd try and think up some clever comment but I think Rude just about covered it.

Monday, January 13, 2014

The Republicans' Obamacare Hypocrisy: A Mystery Solved

Paul Krugman

And here's the thing: Republicans don't want to help the unfortunate. They'll propound health-care ideas that will, they claim, help those with pre-existing conditions and so on - but those aren't really proposals. They're diversionary tactics designed to stall real health reform. Hence the rage of the right.

Here they were, with a whole raft of ideas they could throw out like chaff to confuse enemy radar, to divert and confuse any attempt to actually provide insurance to the uninsured. And those dastardly Democrats have gone ahead and actually incorporated those ideas into real reform.

Shorter: If you think government can't do anything substantial, then you'd better make damn sure it can't, for when it does it makes you look like an idiot or a liar. Both of which the Repugs are.

Ouote of the Day

I'm not too interested in "Bridgegazi" as other than a "popcorn - extra butter!" moment. Anything that keeps the ostensibly "sane" Repug out of the '16 Presidential race is a GOOD thing. If the crazies are the only ones they can field, we're safe.

That said, the Repugs are putting a double-reverse spin on the whole deal that I find hilarious. From a pretty good piece called "Christie apologists hit rock bottom: Why the right’s lame, new defense is doomed to fail":

Conservatives can (and do) whine that the problem here is media bias — that the media largely ignored IRS and Benghazi then swarmed over the Christie story because he’s a Republican. The scientific term for this argument is “bullshit.”

"Bullshit" is the all-encompassing scientific term for everything else the Repugs do as well.

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times

Britain to Introduce Plastic Money in 2016
In 2017: brightly colored beads.

List Whittled Down to 1000 Eligible Applicants for One-Way Trip to Mars
Eliminated: old, infirm, anyone who plays the banjo, harmonica or accordion.

??? ~ News Quiz ~ ???

The Texas commission in charge of reining in predatory lenders is headed by a top executive of:


A ) an oil company
B ) a textile company
C ) a predatory lender

Hint: remember, this is Texas.

Target Now Says 110 Million Accounts Hacked
As a result, it could take weeks before hackers start stealing from you.

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Saturday Emmylou Blogging


Emmylou Harris ~ Going Back To Harlan
Thanks to elp1978.

Friday, January 10, 2014

Bridgeghazi

There's been so much about poor innocent victim Secaucus Fats and his fucked up lane closure that I've been hesitant to post anything because it's old news about the time I hit "publish". Heh. Old Fart's got a good take on it. I wanta be like him when I grow up!

Thanks to oldfartrants.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

NSA Insiders Reveal What Went Wrong

A 'recommended read' at Consortiumnews.com

In a memo to President Obama, former National Security Agency insiders explain how NSA leaders botched intelligence collection and analysis before 9/11, covered up the mistakes, and violated the constitutional rights of the American people, all while wasting billions of dollars and misleading the public.

The sadder reality, Mr. President, is that NSA itself had enough information to prevent 9/11, but chose to sit on it rather than share it with the FBI or CIA. We know; we were there. We were witness to the many bureaucratic indignities that made NSA at least as culpable for pre-9/11 failures as are other U.S. intelligence agencies.
...

Pre-9/11 Intelligence

“That’s where I found the pre- and post-9/11 intelligence from NSA monitoring of some of the hijackers as they planned the attacks of 9/11 had not been shared outside NSA. This includes critical pre-9/11 intelligence on al-Qaeda, even though it had been worked on by NSA analysts. I learned, for example, that in early 2001 NSA had produced a critical long-term analytic report unraveling the entire heart of al-Qaeda and associated movements. That report also was not disseminated outside of NSA.

“Make no mistake. That data and the analytic report could have, should have prevented 9/11.

“Top NSA management knew that. They knew that I knew that. I was immediately shut down. In spring 2002, the remnants of THINTHREAD were unceremoniously put on the shelf in NSA’s ‘Indiana Jones’ data warehouse, never to be seen again.
...

“Against this background, it is difficult to listen to the manufactured claim so frequently heard these days to the effect that, had bulk collection been operational before 9/11, it would have prevented the 9/11 attacks. The mantra is convenient for those defending NSA overreach; it is also bogus.

“It masks the reality that, as indicated above, NSA had already collected highly significant intelligence on the hijackers themselves but did not disseminate it outside of NSA before the attacks. At best, the claim about bulk collection is one part wishful thinking and nine parts red herring.

“Not only does it exaggerate the efficacy of a collection method with zero demonstrated successes to date, but it also blows smoke in the eyes of those genuinely interested in knowing what role NSA played, or failed to play, in the months and weeks before 9/11. Worse still, this specious claim amounts to a cruel hoax on the thousands who died on 9/11, and the hundreds of thousands who died when Bush/Cheney used the attacks as a pretext to invade Iraq.”

Former Vice President Dick Cheney is widely reported to have been principally responsible for suborning then-NSA Director Michael Hayden into violating what had formerly been the “First Commandment” at NSA – “Thou Shalt Not Eavesdrop on Americans Without a Court Warrant.” So it is no surprise to see Cheney come out of the woodwork and renew his contribution toward giving dishonesty a bad name.
...

It should now be clear, for those who can handle the truth, that the problems at NSA run deep – in terms of effectiveness, integrity and respect for the Constitution. By withholding information and exploiting secrecy, NSA’s leaders past and present have pulled off an unparalleled coup in concealing the sad reality that NSA could have prevented 9/11 and didn’t. And Schadenfreude chortling by leaders at the top regarding the demonstrated bureaucratic advantages and success of such dishonesty has a tendency to be heard down through the ranks, corrupting even dedicated workers.

Which brings us to Snowden. I'm glad he blew the whistle, but he's no hero. Neither is he a villain except to the powers that be whom he blew the whistle on.

He is smart enough to have ran and hid in more or less plain view of the media while all the info got swirled around and people noticed. If he'da stayed in the U.S. he'da been buried under a jail somewhere along with all the information.

At least the warrantless spying is poking its way out into the open, along with the uselessness and waste of the program.

And we need to lock up all the unicorns so Cheney can't drink their blood and will die.

Oh, the irony...

The guys at Ironic Times were late yesterday.

Comments by Duck Dynasty Patriarch Phil Robertson Divide Nation
On one side, those who hate homosexuals, blacks, immigrants, Jews, anyone not like themselves; on other side, those who don't.

Poll: One Third of Americans Don't Believe in Evolution
Do believe in Hell, which is where you wind up if you believe in evolution.

Brazil in Race With Poor Planning, Criminal Negligence, Widespread Corruption, to Complete Stadiums in Time for World Cup
Poor planning, criminal negligence, widespread corruption favored to win.

Monday, January 6, 2014

Liz Pulls Out

Lotsa articles about this today, but TBogg's is the snarkiest. Don't miss!

But it seems that Liz recently sat down with her pollsters who aggregated, weighted, and indexed a collection of statewide polls in Wyoming using formulas which accounted for economic status, ethnicity, party identification and past voting history and concluded that, as her head pollster explained to her: “nobody likes you, everybody hates you, they think you should eat some worms..” and so now Liz is probably going to pull out just like her dad didn’t do when he really really needed that fifth deferment.
...

Needless to say, I will miss watching Liz Cheney become more and more shrill and homicidal as her campaign continued to implode until eventually she would lose it on national TV (I had: ‘shanks an uppity reporter’ in my office pool). But now she will just pack up her carpetbags and sadly head back to Virginia where she’ll probably sit around the house in sweats all day drinking pitchers of blood orange jalapeno margaritas and screaming at Ellen on the teevee because it’s all the lesbian’s [Mary Cheney's] fault and now America is going to die or something…

Princess Snarlyface, we hardly knew ye…
We knew her well enough. Good fucking riddance.

Saturday, January 4, 2014

Headline of the Day +

As Obamacare Sign-Ups Surge, So Does Conservative Rage

First and last lines:

It is amazing to witness the sheer depths of rage, denial and disgust many people experience as they see millions of people gaining access to affordable health care for the first time.
...

These are the numbers. Lots of people have partisan or ideological or in many cases deeply emotional needs not to believe them. But these are the numbers.

Fuck conservatives. I hope their goddam heads explode. Perhaps that's covered under the insurance they don't like.

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

You know the songs.

Thanks to Larry Privat.

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Start The New Year Off Right...

...and do yourself a favor. Read this heartwarming article by Matt Taibbi!

On Christmas, Republicans Quietly Declare War on Themselves
...

The news came in the Wall Street Journal, where the Chamber of Commerce disclosed that it will be teaming up with Republican establishment leaders to spend $50 million in an effort to stem the tide of “fools” who have overwhelmed Republican ballots in recent seasons. Check out the language Chamber strategist Scott Reed used in announcing the new campaign:

Our No. 1 focus is to make sure, when it comes to the Senate, that we have no loser candidates… That will be our mantra: No fools on our ticket.
...

It’s been a transparent effort to reassure industry donors that the party's future isn't a bottomless pit of brainless Bachmanns and Cruzes and Santorums, all convinced our Harvard-educated president is a sleeper-cell Arab and that Satan is a literal being intent on conquering Nebraska with U.N. troops.
Good fuckin' luck. The phrase "shoveling shit against the tide" comes to mind. Heh.

The Chamber's announcement was met with howls of outrage from Tea Party-friendly voices, who naturally took immediate offense to the prospect of boycotting "fools" from the political process.
Sorry. I guess I should have given a "liquid alert". Well, the 'baggers seem to have a handle on who their candidates are!

The money shot:

But this sudden decision by the party’s Washington establishment to reverse course and blame their failures on "fools" out there in the heartland is a joke. If you spend a decade treating your constituents like morons, you can’t point the finger at them when your party gets a reputation for being stupid.

You’re going to make George "Is our children learning?" Bush the face of your party for eight years and then turn around and call your voters stupid? Jesus. No wonder they decided to make the move during Christmas.
Repugs do seem to do better when no one's watching...

Much more. Enjoy.

Monday, December 30, 2013

Oh, the irony...

Ironic Times. Go see this one. Heh.

China Rejects 546,000 Tons of U.S. Grain Because It Contains Genetically Modified Material
Really? China?

Real Estate Agents Using Drones to Show Clients Houses, Neighborhoods
Can hover inside homes, peruse owners' financial papers, determine how desperate they are to sell.

Obama Calls Broccoli His Favorite Food
After meeting with his favorite person, John Boehner.
Heh.


Obama, on Vacation in Hawaii,
Attends “Choom Gang” Reunion

Michelle says she hasn't seen him in days.

Heh. Takes days to get to Colorado for OTC ganja. And remember to go back...

Polar Opposites

As a lifelong Californio I'm down wid being the polar opposite of Texass. Interesting read in WaPo.

Headline:

Texas, California embody red-blue divide
Last line:

More than any other pair of states, they stand as proxies for the national debate about the size and shape of government and which direction a divided America should go in the future.
Comments:

Here is the problem with moving to Texas,,, You would have to live there.
...

I have visited Bakersfield in the '50's ... there was a sign on the front of a store stating No CHINESE, BLACKS OR INDIANS, DOGS ARE WELCOME ... and I would still take Bakersfield over Texass ...
Heh. Much more.