(WIKILEAKS) URGENT DISPATCH: FRONT LINES / WAR ON CHRISTMAS
Am under heavy fire from Intercontinental Ballistic Mistletoe. STOP
Ah, the War on Christmas rages once more. 'Tis the season.
Flairs up around this time each winter -- a right-wing holiday tradition that seems to bring more unintentional cheer with each passing year.
Gretchen Carlson of "Fox and Friends" got the memo from the Man Upstairs (no, not Him -- Ailes). She trumpeted this "crazy" (and sadly, false) story about a Florida school banning red and green, and rolled some silly tape. Soon after, Stephen Colbert lit her up like a holiday tree -- his mocking well-hung by the chimney with care. (Blitzkreig on Grinchitude)
By the chimney? Mox nix as long as yer well-hung...with care, of course.
Christmas is supposed to be all Christian and non-materialistic -- a message Fox News Radio stooge John Gibson embraced by cashing in with a "War on Christmas" book. (The subtitle -- "How the Liberal Plot to Ban the Sacred Christian Holiday is Worse Than You Thought" - suggests the man is not hauling a full sack of presents.)
But this year's Sergeant Shultz and Colonel Klink in the War on Christmas have to be GOP Sens. Jon Kyl and Jim DeMint. Kyl accused Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid of "disrespecting one of the two holiest of holidays for Christians." DeMint chimed in with more phony piety -- calling Democratic efforts to do the people's business in the two weeks around Christmas "sacrilegious."
Jiminy Christmas -- how stupid do these disingenuous GOP-holes think the American people are? I suppose their excuse is they're just playing to their constituents in the Jingle Belt. Poor saps. All they were doing was angling for a new way to screw Obama -- surely they didn't mean to deploy Jesus as a political weapon.
That last line is the most tongue-in-cheek and sarcastic line in the piece. It's what the Repugs do, it's who they are. Work Jesus like a redheaded stepchild to their advantage with the great mis-informed.