Natural events can be disasters in human terms, but we're just along for the ride like fleas on a cow. I chose the 'cow' analogy on purpose.
Earthquakes are Mom doing a little self-chiropractic spinal stress relief, like a cow does when it stands up.
Tsunamis are Mom's shiver of pleasurable relief when the back pain goes away. Feels sooooo good.
Volcanoes are another way of relieving stress in her bowels. Sea floor vents and hot water geysers are like SBDs. Volcanoes are riproarin' most-certainly-not-SBDs of the not-in-church-please-dear-God aftermath-of-All-U-Can-Eat-burrito-nite variety! Mom likes to light her farts and have sparks shoot out her ample ass. Hey, don't we all? I do not recommend trying this on a cow, but hey, your call. Your hair will grow back. Video, please.
The tiny-brained amongst us would do well to remember where the hell they are when they poo-poo climate change and volcano monitoring and other metrics that tell us which way to jump. Maybe they're not on the cow but already on the cow pie, which is the place we're going to end up if we fuck up our only ride.
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