Thanksgiving is next week, and President Bush could make it a really special holiday by resigning.
[...] Dick Cheney, obviously, would have to quit as well as Bush. In fact, just to be on the safe side, the vice president ought to turn in his resignation first. (We’re desperate, but not crazy.) Then House Speaker Nancy Pelosi would become president until Jan. 20. [...]
As a bonus, the Pelosi presidency would put a woman in the White House this year after all. On the downside, a few right-wing talk-show hosts might succumb to apoplexy. That would, of course, be terrible, but I’m afraid we might have to take the risk in the name of a greater good.
Now there's a risk I'm willing to take! The prospect of seeing their faces turn red and their heads explode is strangely arousing.
Can I see a show of hands? How many people want George W. out and Barack in?
I hope you all didn't spill your coffee on yourselves when your hands reflexively shot up.
If Bush gives up doing nothing by giving up his job, it’s possible that someday history might elevate him to the ranks of the below average. Better than Franklin Pierce! Smarter than Warren Harding! And healthier than William Henry Harrison!
The person who would like this plan least probably would be Barack Obama. [...]
Fuck him. Get his ass in there!
Ah, to dream...
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