Watch this! Heh...

Normally I would put something like this at Fixer & Gordon, but this is just too funny and I had to share! I think you will be able to tell almost from the start how this is going to go. I suspect alcohol involvement.

The title of this is 'Prawdziwy kaskader'. 'Kaskader' is Polish for 'stunt men'. One wonders if the rider knew he was one when he let the clutch out...


I think if there's a moral to this story, it's "If you can't start it by yourself, don't ride it. But if you do, make sure there's video!"

Thanks to edzierzoniow.

Addendum:

Speaking of video, I wish we coulda seen the look on the guy's face when he came to three simultaneous "OH SHIT!" moments:

1) When he realized that the grand steaming pile of Polish home-brew under him was not going to turn*, and

2) Also that the throttle of said GSTPOPHB was STUCK!, and

3) His ride was about over and the corollary simultaneity of wondering just how badly it was going to end.

*Don't feel bad, buddy. Nobody coulda turned that thing. Heh.

There's a larger point to be made here as well. As I have said repeatedly, there is an element of politics in everything, and here's the point in that video:

Everybody the world over is pretty much the same as everybody else, even, maybe especially, gearhead bozos like us and those Polish dudes. I woulda felt right at home if I had been there with them when that bomb went off. If ever the people of the world realize this and stop hating each other, the true promise of humankind can commence. I'm not holding my breath.

Saturday Crazy Badass Biker Music Blogging

Thanks to flydguzmon.

Saturday Emmylou Blogging

Emmylou Harris, Kieran Kane, and Barry and Holly Tashian perform "When I Found You" with Mark O'Connor and Glenn Worf.

Thanks to BluegrasBanjoLover.

Today's How-To

If things go like we want and due process is applied to our war criminals, this is something we should all know how to do.



Then we need to figure out how long to make the rope so that:

1) Cheney's feet don't hit the ground. We wanta break his neck, not his ankles.
2) His neck snaps cleanly without tearing his head off. That would be bad form.

Then we put the noose just behind his left ear and let 'er drop. If we do it right, his feet will make a quarter turn to the right when he stops.

I'm hearing a lot of right-wing noise that going after these war criminals is 'retribution'. It is most certainly not. It is simply JUSTICE under the LAW.

Reclaiming America’s Soul

Today's 'must read' by Paul Krugman:

[...] We need to look forward, not backward, they say. No prosecutions, please; no investigations; we’re just too busy.

For the fact is that officials in the Bush administration instituted torture as a policy, misled the nation into a war they wanted to fight and, probably, tortured people in the attempt to extract “confessions” that would justify that war. And during the march to war, most of the political and media establishment looked the other way.

It’s hard, then, not to be cynical when some of the people who should have spoken out against what was happening, but didn’t, now declare that we should forget the whole era — for the sake of the country, of course.

Sorry, but what we really should do for the sake of the country is have investigations both of torture and of the march to war. These investigations should, where appropriate, be followed by prosecutions — not out of vindictiveness, but because this is a nation of laws.

We need to do this for the sake of our future. For this isn’t about looking backward, it’s about looking forward — because it’s about reclaiming America’s soul.

Amen.

How sweet it is!

WEAR TV 3 (Pensacola - Mobile - Ft.Walton Beach)

PRAGUE (AP) -- Former Klan leader David Duke has been detained by police in the Czech Republic on suspicion of denying the Holocaust.

Duke went there at the invitation of neo-Nazis to promote the Czech translation of a book he wrote.

A police spokesman says the book includes a denial of the Holocaust.

The denial is a crime that is punishable by up to three years in Czech prisons.

He's all yours, my Czech brothers. Good on yas.

Holder Just Made Me a Promise

By David Swanson of AfterDowningStreet.org

As Attorney General Eric Holder left an appropriations subcommittee hearing on Thursday I spoke loudly from the third row as he prepared to leave the room:

"We need a special prosecutor for torture, Mr. Attorney General. Americans like the rule of law. The rule of law for everybody."

He replied as he approached and walked by, surrounded by bodyguards:

"And you will be proud of your country."

I was joined by others in replying simultaneously:

"Yes, we want to be proud of our country. We're ready. No need to wait."

Holder knew exactly what it would take for me to be proud of my country, and he told me directly that I would be.

Will I? Time will tell.

Go read the rest, and when you come to this link, go read it too:

I just posted an excellent article the AG should read.

Here's a tease:

To: Reinhard Heydrich

From: Joseph Alstotter, Chief of Section of Legality

Re: Transportation

Date: February 1, 1942

You have asked the legal opinion of the Section of Legality on a matter related to transportation.

Quote of the Day

Digby:

... It's quite clear that the only "rule of law" these people care about is one that says you can't lie about your sex life. Maybe if the Department of Justice could find a smoking blow job in the OLC we might get to the bottom of all this.

...

Off to start painting. Probably have an update from the house later.

Quote of the Day

Maru on the Bush torture regime:

...

I can't wait to see these ball-gargling smegma breathed fucktwits get what they deserve.
Hang the Nazi wannabe fuckers.

Update:

The two old guys (Gord and Grandpa Eddie) got me thinking about hanging and I remembered a song from the old Ren and Stimpy cartoon series (I used to watch it religiously). Couldn't find the one from the show, but this kid does it quite well:

From Ren and Stimpy - The Lord Loves A Hangin'

Lyric:

Oh, Lord loves a hangin'.
That's why He gave us necks.
It tightens up our vocal cords
And loosens up our pecs.

So if you are a horse theif
And guilty to the bone,
Go ahead and blame a friend
And you won't hang alone.

It may be hard to swaller,
But you'll be three feet taller.
It's a dandy way to entertain your friends.

You say you are a villain,
But can't abide by killin';
Go ahead a steal yourself a horse.

Oh, Lord loves a hangin'.
And so do we, by heck;
So get yerself a lasso
And decorate your neck.

Oh, we is awful ignorant
And uglier 'n sin;
So go ahead 'n cut us down
And hang us all again,

Hangin' that is. Swing a spell...

Dream Cruise. Dream On.

Got this from Bustednuckles.

[I was checking cruise lines because I heard the rates are very cheap right now.

I found a Somali cruise package that departs from Sawakin (in the Sudan ) and docks at Bagamoya (in Tanzania ).

The cost is a bit high @ 800 per person double occupancy but I didn’t find that offensive. What I found encouraging and enlightened is that the cruise is encouraging people to bring their 'High powered weapons' along on the cruise. If you don’t have weapons you can rent them right there on the boat. They claim to have a master blacksmith on board and will have reloading parties every afternoon. The cruise lasts from 4-8 days and nights and costs a maximum of $3200 per person double occupancy (4 days). All the boat does is sail up and down the coast of Somalia waiting to get hijacked by pirates. Here are some of the costs and claims associated with the package.

$800.00 US/per day double occupancy (4 day max billing)

M-16 full auto rental $ 25.00/day ammo at 100 rounds of 5.56 armor piercing ammo at 15.95

Ak-47 rifle @ No charge. ammo at 100 rounds of 7.62 Com block ball ammo at 14.95

Barrett M-107 .50 Cal sniper riffle rental 55.00/day ammo at 25 rounds 50 Cal armor piercing at 9.95

Crew members can double as spotters for 30.00 per hour (spotting scope included).

Jesus Christ---- they even offer RPG's at 75 bucks and 200 dollars for 3 standard loads

"Everyone gets use of free complimentary night vision equipment and coffee and snacks on the top deck from 7pm-6am."

Meals are not included but seem reasonable.

Most cruises offer a mini-bar... these gung ho entrepreneurs offer......... get this.....

"MOUNTED MINIGUN AVAILABLE @ 450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire"

Sign my arse up!

They advertise group rates and corporate discounts...... and even claim "FUN FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY"

They even offer a partial money back if not satisfied....here’s some text from the ad.

"We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or we will refund half your money back including gun rental charges and any unused ammo ( mini gun charges not included).. How can we guarantee you will experience a hijacking? We operate at 5 knots within 12 miles of the coast of Somalia . If an attempted Hijacking does not occur we will turn the boat around and cruise by at 4 knots. We will repeat this for up to 8 days making three passes a day along the entire length of Somalia . At night the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off at intervals and loud disco music beamed shore side to attract attention. Cabin space is limited so respond quickly. Reserve your package before Feb 29 and get 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice."

As if all that isn’t enough to whet your appetite, there were a few testimonials

“I got three confirmed kills on my last trip. I'LL never hunt big game in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in Schindlers list!”---- Lars , Hamburg Germany

"Six attacks in 4 days was more than I expected. I bagged three pirates and my 12yr old son sank two rowboats with the minigun. PIRATES 0 -PASSENGERS-32! Well worth the trip. Just make sure your spotter speaks English"--- Ned, Salt Lake City , Utah USA

"I haven’t had this much fun since flying choppers in NAM . Don’t worry about getting shot by pirates as they never even got close to the ship with those weapons they use and their shitty aim--reminds me of a drunken 'juicer' door gunner we picked up from the motor pool back in Nam" --"chopper" Dan ----Toledo USA.

"Like ducks in a barrel. They turned the ship around and we saw them bleed and cry in the water like little girls. Saw one wounded pirate eaten by sharks--what a laugh riot!! This is a must do.--- Zeke-Minnahaw Springs Kentucky USA

Finally, someone had the common sense to cash in AND solve a major problem. These folks deserve a medal!]

It's a nice idea, but it's a gag. What tipped me off was the ammo prices - if you can get 50 rounds of .50 cal. ammo for $9.95, buy all you can get! Those things are three bucks a round and up most places, and why would you need armor-piercing rounds to shoot at people?

4 knots... making three passes a day along the entire length of Somalia

The Somalia coast is 3025km (1890 miles) long. Without even taking into account the difference between a nautical mile and a statute mile, it would take about 19 days to transit the length of the Somalia coast once at that speed.

Also, the Somali pirates operate hundreds of miles off their coast so as not to shit in their own nest. At 12 miles, you might get a boatload of kids tryin' ta sell ya T-shirts, but that's about it.

So I googled up 'pirate cruise sudan to tanzania' and got - the above story. Drat.

Nice try, boys. Next time ya wanta get my hopes up, do yer homework.

Precedents ...

About 4 years ago, I offered to reenlist and go to Iraq if Jonah Goldberg did the same:

...

I'll go these warmongers one better. If Jonah Goldberg makes the attempt to enlist, so will I. I'll dust off my DD Form 214 and head down to the recruiters the same day. Regardless of the fact I already served this country for 8 years (6 active, 2 reserve), I'll go back if the man who said he'd serve (if he didn't have a family and a job) gave it his best shot. Come on, Jonah, let's sign up as buddies. Lotsa guys did it when I went in. If you go, I'll go with ya. And I even promise not to kill ya, even if the opportunity presents itself. If ya signed up, I'd have too much respect for you to want to snap your soft spine with my bare hands. So here's the deal. If Jonah goes, I'll go too. Whaddaya say, Lardass? Are ya man enough to take me up on it? Let me know.

So today, once again, I'll rise to the challenge. Last night, Keith Olbermann laid this out to Sean Hannity:

...

Olbermann: You'll do it for charity? For the troops families? I'll take you up on that Sean. For every second you last, $1000. Live or on tape provided other networks cameras are there. $1000 a second Sean because this is no game. This is serious stuff. Put your money where your mouth is, and your nose. And I'll double it when you admit you feared for your life. When you admit the horrible truth. Waterboarding, a symbol of the last administration, is torture.

...

If Sean Hannity actually has the balls to get waterboarded according to Keith's conditions, I'll match Keith's donation, dollar for dollar, though to the military charity of my choice.

There it is.

Update:

Since Hannity wussed out, I'll be spreading an extra $1000 to the military charities we already support this year ... in Sean's name.

Houston, We Have A Solution

Just so Grandpa Eddie can't accuse me of stealing this from him (big shit-eatin' grin), I customized it with a bullshit-brown border in honor of Texas' contribution to our nation. In every field other than music, of course.

Thanks to AndyCobbonUTube.

Torture and the Permanent Republican Majority

The Rude Pundit

But what doesn't come through immediately is the answer to a simple question: why? Why did the Bush administration commit and allow (and encourage, if not force others to commit) what are, seemingly without a doubt, treaty-busting crimes? Because, see, you read something like footnote 10 on page 2 and you come across this line: "According to Gonzales, the 'positive' consequences of setting aside the Third Geneva Convention include 'preserving flexibility' and 'substantially reduc[ing] the threat of domestic criminal prosecution under the War Crimes Act,'" and you realize that, whatever the motivation of the people involved, they didn't care. And they didn't care for a simple reason to answer that simple question: the Bush administration thought it was the beginning of an ascendant Republican reign and that they'd never be investigated (my em).

Look back at when all this shit went down. Karl Rove and others were talking about a permanent Republican majority. So, rather than go whole hog with blow torches and pliers, the Office of Legal Counsel pushed methods as far as they could go. In other words, as long as they could say, at the end of the day, that there was a line they would not cross, a Republican Congress wouldn't do jackshit to stop them. As John "I Teach Students" Yoo wrote in his March 14, 2003 memo, criminal laws would not apply to certain interrogations and the Justice Department could not therefore prosecute the interrogators. Again, you only say that if you think you're going to control the Justice Department for time immemorial.

Time's up.

Montana jail tries for detainees from Gitmo

Billings Gazette

Economic development officials in Hardin are looking at the soon-to-close detention facility in Guantanamo Bay as a possible fix for the jail sitting empty in Hardin.

Meanwhile, a 460-bed detention facility sits empty in Hardin. Built by Two Rivers Authority, the city's economic development arm, the facility was meant to bring economic development to Hardin by creating more than 100 high-paying jobs.

And bringing detainees to this area has happened before, Smith said. There were prisoner-of-war camps in Laurel during World War II. There were also internee camps in Missoula and near Powell, Wyo.

Offering a turnkey facility is practically a patriotic duty, Smith said.

For Smith and many in Hardin, that can't come soon enough. Smith said it is his job to "uncover every rock" to find ways to get the detention center operating. He knows there are options available, it's just a matter for finding them and seeking out contracts. People who don't like the idea of alleged enemy combatants coming to town can help, he said.

"To those who don't want it, help us find something so we can fill it," Smith said.

I wish these folks well in their efforts to fill what sounds like a very nice brand-new jail. If the Gitmo prisoners don't quite fill it, I have a suggestion:

There's gonna be a whole buncha new inmates from all this torture shit - Yoo, Bybee, Rice, Cheney, etc. I suggest they'd be a very good fit with the folks they wanted to torture.

One thing - be sure to put very high quality video cameras on the yard so we can watch them play together. Heh.

Cheney, Rice signed off on interrogation techniques

McClatchy

WASHINGTON — A newly declassified narrative of the Bush administration's advice to the CIA on harsh interrogations shows that the small group of Justice Department lawyers who wrote memos authorizing controversial interrogation techniques were operating not on their own but with direction from top administration officials, including then-Vice President Dick Cheney and National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice.

Like, duh. By the way, there's nothing "controversial" about torture. It's illegal and a war crime. Period. No matter what the Repugs say.

Cheney couldn't be reached for comment. Rice, through an aide, declined to comment.

Their comments will be limited to the 5th Amendment from here on out.

While the senators deemed some of the legal analyses "deeply flawed," they said that criminalizing bad legal opinions "would have a deeply chilling effect on the ability of lawyers in any administration to provide their client — the U.S. government — with their best legal advice."

If that was "their best legal advice", I hope they represent themselves at their trials. Heh.

Feel sumthin' tightening around yer neck, Dick Boy?

Mama Got Her Groove Back!

BradBlog, links at site:

Following a nearly two-month absence from the airwaves, Progressive radio talker Randi Rhodes is set to return, according to an announcement this afternoon from John Scott of San Francisco's Green960 (KKGN). She will be syndicated by Premiere Radio Networks as reported in a video-taped announcement just posted on the Green960 website.

Premiere is known for their national syndication of far-right talkers such as Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Dr. Laura and Glenn Beck. Rhodes, known by fans as the "Goddess of Progressive Talk", had formerly been with NovaM Radio, which folded when she left, and at Air America Radio prior to that...

In honor of this momentous occasion, I present Randi's theme song:

Rusty Warren ~ Bounce Yer Boobies

Thanks to joeyC619.

Personally ...

In light of this, I think we should build a new border fence just north (We'll keep the race track, thank you. Heh ...) of the Dallas/Ft. Worth Metroplex.

...

In a new survey by Research 2000 for the liberal Daily Kos blog, Texas voters were asked whether the Lone Star State would be better off as an "independent nation" or as part of the United States.

Overall, more than six in ten chose the latter option. (No big surprise there.) But, among Republicans, 48 percent said it would be better for Texas if the state was an independent nation -- the same number who said they would prefer the state remain a part of the United States.

Just to reiterate: roughly half of all self-identified Texas Republicans in the Research 2000 poll said they would rather their state be an independent nation. [my em]

...

Either:

A) The Republicans are kicking up this sturm und drang to distract from the torture talk or:

2) The Republicans (especially in Texas) are that far gone that the only thing the base will respond to is breaking the union apart to get away from a black President.

Because:

C) Rick Perry can't actually believe this will keep him in the governor's chair.

Weren't these the same people who called us un-American and traitors for speaking out against the "war" in Iraq? Aren't they the ones who called us treasonous for criticizing Bush/Cheney policies? Good thing to see their allegiance to this country runs so deep.

I say, go and don't let the door hit ya in the ass. 'Texasland' will make a nice buffer between us and Mexico.

Great thanks to Oliver Willis for the link.

Aw, Christ ...

Could this be the Rethugs last stand (well, maybe the last until the torture trials start)? They're being whiny bitchez:

The right-wing crackpots have been in a frenzy over the nomination of Kathleen Sebelius as Secretary of Health and Human Services (HHS). And, as we all now know, the right-wing crackpots are all that's left in the GOP. Today, GOP Senate Leader Mitch McConnell announced, in so many words, that on behalf of the extremists in his caucus, the Republicans are filibustering the nomination of Sebelius. [my em]

...

The American people, at this point, finally, see them as nothing more than babies. The word "filibuster" doesn't scare anybody anymore. If the Rethugs are trying to rebrand, they're doin' it wrong.

Shameless blogwhoring

If ya like Steve McQueen, The Great Escape, or Triumph motorcycles, please go see this.

Baba Whoey

Fixer sometimes gives me ideas. Or leads me astray. Whatever.

If this song sounds familiar, it's because it's on TV about ten times a day as the theme song for CSI:NY. I present it here because I'm queer for Melina Kanakaredes. Also Gary Sinise and Roger Daltrey, but I won't go into that...

The Who

Thanks to gawlerpete, Oz.