Thursday, April 5, 2012

Citing Safety Concerns, Somali Pirates Refuse to Board Cruise Ships

MOGADISHU (The Borowitz Report) April 5, 2012 – In yet another public relations setback for the beleaguered cruise industry, Somali pirates today said they would no longer board cruise ships, citing "unsafe working conditions."
...

The pirate said that the recent fire that crippled the cruise ship Azamara Quest "has sent a shiver through the pirate community."
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When asked if the Somali pirates might attempt to board cruise ships in the future, he responded, "I am telling me hearties that if they were thinking of pillaging a cruise ship of its booty over Easter Break, they should make alternative plans."

Carol Foyler, a spokesperson for cruise industry, said that the cruise ship companies "would be working overtime to win back the pirates' trust."

More buffets oughta help...

According to my unimpeachable sources (ahem), Somali pirates have an agreement with the Cunard Line to not board their vessels, citing the dress codes.

4 comments:

Fixer said...

They'd have 500 old Limey women beating their ass with walking canes, especially if they interrupted the buffet.

Gordon said...

Ask the man who knows...:-P

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