Everyone got excited that this might be the year the Liberal Democrats (who are mildly liberal and very dysfunctional -- like our Democrats) did something at the polls. But as usual, it was all a tease and they've managed to barely increase their vote and not increase their seats.
Gordon Brown, who combines the charisma of Dukakis and the glower of Nixon into one unpopular package led a Labour Party that had exhausted itself after 16 years of governing to an abysmal performance of just over a quarter of the vote.
And the Tories, led by longtime aspirant David Cameron, who conservative papers laughably tried to turn into a "Hope" poster, gained votes, mostly because Labour lost them, but have come up well-short of what is needed for a majority.
So nobody really wins -- a hung Parliament.
At least Lizzie has some idea of how things should work (I'd say Charles would be good at the job too, but it's etched in stone somewhere that Charles will never be King). Couldn't do worse than Tony Blair.
As for Wayne Rooney as PM, my choice would be John Terry. He's already filled one requirement of being a British politician.