Sunday, January 16, 2005

Sour Krauthammer

James Wolcott lays into hardly-ever-right-wing pundit and columnist Charles Krauthammer, my number one pick for "Wheelchair Bound Guy I'd Most Like To Help Down The Capitol Steps". In a non-partisan manner, of course.
Don't conservatives ever get bored spouting the same old tailpipe exhaust? I know they don't care about boring the audience--they assume that you can't tell those dumbies anything often enough--but don't they ever bore themselves? Don't they ever experience an inner slump when they're about to repeat an anecdote as tired and stale as a downtown hooker after Fleet Week?

No, I don't believe they do. They use those faded anecdotes the way Reagan used his, as wadded-up insulation to stuff in the holes of their brain and prevent any new or unsettling notions from breezing in and rattling their convictions. Even Charles Krauthammer, considered to be one of the more "thoughtful" conservatives (depth perception being a matter of degrees--compared to Fred Barnes, a fossil shell looks thoughtful), is as mechanical as a player piano. Put a quarter in the slot, and he churns out a column that sounds like senility set to a ragtime rhythm.

Wolcott has an amazing way with words. Go read. You'll get a kick out of it.

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